One-way streets are frustrating.

Trying to find the theatre screening The Hebrew Hammer, we somehow ended up at the top of a mountain. Eventually, we found the theatre, bought tickets, secured a hotel room, and crashed. —This is the plan. We'll nap now. Then we'll go eat and watch the movie. Then we can walk around the city. Then we'll sleep and tomorrow morning we can walk around the city some more before leaving.

—Pas mal, j'ai rencontré une super fille hier. Tu veux prendre un petit caf' plus tard? J'adore quand tu léches mes couilles… Tu veux me faire une petite pipe plus tard? Coucou toi, ca va? Ouais, et toi? Combien de kilomètres doit un homme doit marcher avant que l'on puisse l'appeler un homme? J'aime bien me faire carroter.
—Do you take American Express?
—Yes we do, sir.

I set out to buy pants and underwear. On one street, there were a lot of department stores, none of which I recognized. I didn't really know where to go, until I saw a Gap. Thank God for globalization. I walked inside the Gap, picked out some cheap underwear and khakis. Mission: Accomplished.

I like how in Montreal, sales people start small talk in French and once you respond in English, they immediately switch to English. If you don't respond in English, they assume you're French. It's a little game you can play at stores.


After taking a very nice shower, we went out for dinner. We were in Montreal. We could enjoy all sorts of cuisine. Where did we eat? Subway. Thank God for globalization.


The Hebrew Hammer

The movie is very much Undercover Brother but with an excess of Jew jokes instead of black people jokes. A lot of the comedy is rooted in random jokes. There's a lot of stupid stuff in the movie. At the same time, I don't wanna say that I didn't laugh. I laughed, even at some of the stupid stuff. It's all a matter of taste. Definitely not what we expected, but it could be worse.

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