Bag scan!

Pictured: "Car fanatic" Apolo Ohno looking very…gold'n.

Not sure why McDonald's replaced the "e" with an apostrophe. Urban spellcheck, I suppose.

I can't help but think of Eric Bischoff's "special" nephew Eugene after winning Kurt Angle's Olympic gold medal in the "Angle Invitational."

Of course, the medal around Eugene's neck isn't made of international translations of "I'm lovin' it."

Or is it "I'm lov'n' it?"

Other side!

Gold'n boy looks like he's about to fall.

Ohno: Oh no!

Apparently, he casts a shadow of the same linguistic substance as his medal. Either that or he has a doppelganger — a Dark Link, if you will. Gold'n Ohno.

Close-up of the copy:

Technically, he's only half-golden (no apostrophe?). His mother is white.

Know what that copy reminds me of?

For the record, I don't eat at McDonald's. It was late, I wanted ice cream, they sell decent dollar sundaes. End of story.