Previously on Adam Riff&#8482:
I type this while wearing retainers I had molded earlier this week.

[sees upper retainer on ottoman]

Oh shit. Did I throw the lower one away?

And that's why you don't store them in a paper towel during lunch!

[rummages through rubbish]

It's not here…

[spots lower retainer on floor]

[sanitizes retainers with everything short of bleach]

[sighs] Okay.

[stares at lower retainer]

Remember, Jon, some people lick buttholes. A retainer that fell on the floor is NOTHING.

Once a week, minimum. [source]

I change mine twice a week but 3x a week in summer. [source]


They're Gawker commenters, though.

Jon: hey, how often do you change your bed sheets?
Lozo: it depends, but ideally, once every two weeks
Chris: like every two weeks
Howard: < two weeks I thought I was a clean person for changing bed sheets every three months. WELP... I don't think I ever changed bed sheets in college.

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