Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

22. Big Lair (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E02)

Honourable Mention

  • Dane Cook singing "The Weight" while being fellated (American Gods, S01E04)
  • Audrey and Laura in the bathroom (American Gods, S01E04)
  • Is Jessica Simpson okay? (Ellen, 05-22-17)
  • Joe makes love to a life-size cardboard cutout of his dead wife (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E01)

Stray Observations

  • "Say 'hello' to my 50/50 blend." (Bob's Burgers, S07E21)
  • "Teddy, unzip my pickle." (Bob's Burgers, S07E21)
  • Bob's Burgers Season Grade: C
  • "'T.A. Cobell.' His name was Taco Bell?" (Making History, S01E09)
  • Making History Season Grade: C-

(American Gods, S01E04)

  • ♫: Apocalyptica – Metallica's "Wherever I May Roam" (The Leftovers, S03E06)
  • ♫: Gravediggaz – "1-800-Suicide" (The Leftovers, S03E06)
  • Michael Bisping (Twin Peaks, S03E01)
  • Max Perlich (Twin Peaks, S03E01)
  • "Ohh, you're nice and wet." (Twin Peaks, S03E02)
  • ♫: Chromatics playing the roadhouse – "Shadow" (Twin Peaks, S03E02)
  • "James is still cool. He's always been cool." (Twin Peaks, S03E02)
  • "Hey, what do you think of my tie? I designed it myself. I call it 'Yoloha.' It's a combination of 'YOLO' and 'aloha.'"
    "Well, Buzzy, I think it's rad, which is a combination of 'retarded' and 'sad.'" (Veep, S06E06)
  • Sudanese boy wearing a Jonah Ryan for U.S. Congress shirt (Veep, S06E06)
  • "Put Wisconsin at the top of my shit list."
    "You want me to bump Sammy Hagar?"
    "Make them 1A and 1B." (Veep, S06E06)
  • "You look like the world's least fucked geisha." (Veep, S06E06)
  • "Could you tell the Colossus of Chodes that this is the exact same goddamn office?" (Veep, S06E06)
  • Gina's list of baby names (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S04E21)
  • "Who's the father?"
    "I signed a non-disclosure agreement, which bars me from revealing his identity."
    "Wait, is he famous?"
    "Is it Batali?"
    "Charles, she can't say. Is it Batali?!" (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S04E21)
  • "The daddy's a Property Brother, isn't he? It's a Property Baby." (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S04E21)
  • Ryan Phillippe (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S04E22)
  • "Pizza Rat, dead tonight at the age of four." (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S04E22)
  • "It's like an Eagles concert down there – nothing but whites." (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S04E22)
  • "Please don't address the jury, Mr. Peralta.
    "But, but, but…"
    "One more 'but' and you will be in contempt."
    "One More Butt and You're in Contempt – name of your sex tape." (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S04E22)
  • Scott Aukerman (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S04E22)
  • Brooklyn Nine-Nine Season Grade: C
  • Robin Leach and Vicki Lawrence (Great News, S01E09)

(Great News, S01E09)

  • "You need to get back on the horse, like when you were going through your chunky phase and you broke that pony's back at the fair. Did I let you quit? No. I made you get back on another pony and they had to put two ponies down that day." (Great News, S01E10)
  • "Gram is mean A-F. That's a Twitter term, which I can only assume stands for 'mean as Frankenstein.' There is another term, D-T-F: 'Don't touch Frankenstein,' to which I usually just reply W-T-F: 'Won't touch Frankenstein.'" (Great News, S01E10)
  • Great News Season Grade: C-
  • "You have to wear it until he's gone." (The Americans, S05E12)
  • Oleg exteriors filmed on location in Moscow (The Americans, S05E12)
  • ♫: Cigarettes After Sex – "Nothing's Gonna Hurt You Baby" (The Handmaid's Tale, S01E07)
  • "Shouldn't we… I'm just saying… A more cautious approach. Why not?"
    "Because the shallow end of the pool is where the turds float." (Fargo, S03E06)
  • Varga googles beside a portrait of Stalin, quotes Lenin (Fargo, S03E06)
  • "There's been an accident."
    "Things of consequence rarely happen by accident." (Fargo, S03E06)
  • "Did anyone see you?"
    "I'm so rarely seen, maybe I don't even exist." (Fargo, S03E06)
  • Archer Season Grade: F
  • "When I reach for Scripture, I go for the Book of Job, Psalm 69." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E02)

"I changed Pepe the Frog into a rabbi." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E03)

  • "We should change our name from the White Warlocks to the White Jewlocks." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E03)
  • "The Torah says we must take an eye for an eye."
    "You mean an oy for an oy." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E03)
  • "I say to hell with forgiveness! Let's kill Neon Joe and leave a nice long trail of goy blood, and then repent for the whole thing on Yom Kippur!" (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E03)
  • "Oi, oi, get that goy!" (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E03)

(Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E03)

  • "You show that moon there's more than one glowing cube with dangling nuts in this town." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E04)
  • "Yoo-hoo! Hey, moon! Look at me! Come and get me! I'm a sexy cube too!" (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E04)
  • "I can't believe Turgalak dead. He's supposed to be all-knowing and invincible. First time I met him, he had a burrito waiting for me, knew exactly how I like it: Chorizo and rice, refried bean, sour cream on the side, little salsa verde, pico de gallo, chips and guac, watermelon agua fresca with just a little bit of ice… He even knew that I liked the flour tortilla rather than corn." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E04)
  • "The prophecy says if a werewolf eats the cube's nuts, he will gain its power and rule the world." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E04)
  • "I don't care that you look like a man. You still got a 'giney, and I speak 'ginese." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E04)
  • "I'm lubed up and ready, moon!" (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E05)
  • "I see somebody's been keeping you company while I was gone."
    "Oh, yeah. Yeah, I got the paper cuts on my dick to prove it. Took a while for them to scab up on account of they don't really make Band-Aid for the penile region. Doing them, you know, the knuckle Band-Aid, that work good, but then I gotta, like, pull it down to pee, pull it back up. I went through a whole lotta Band-Aid." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E05)
  • "Oh, babe… You know that I would've used all the dick Band-Aids in the world if I thought I could've saved you." (Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter, S02E05)
  • Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter Season Grade: C

The New AR™TV World Drama Champion: American Gods
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: Baskets


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