I enter the men's bathroom at my gym and see a homeless-looking dude at the sinks with a bunch of crumpled paper grocery bags on the countertop.

No home, but a gym membership? I wonder.

// 30 min later

I enter the men's bathroom at my gym and see said homeless-looking dude shirtless and making a smoothie, a waste bin beside him on the floor.

So the paper bags contained produce…

I notice a peeler, but instead of chopping up an apple, he take bites of it, chews vigorously, and spits into a two-thirds-filled blender jar.

// 30 min later

He's still making smoothie?

It is 12:30 a.m.

I'm making smoothies in the men's bathroom at my gym and this Asian dude in a ratty Ed Hardy shirt keeps coming in to pee.

Shirt Idea: The BVLGARI logo, but it reads "BVLGOGI."