Broken stories told facetious

// Chicago, IL

What is this, the third train car I've been in this trip that's reeked of cigarettes?

Oh…

10AM on Pink Line.


Fuck, that's right. I can't bring this crispy short rib hummus on the plane. It's more than 3.4 ounces. Don't want to risk checking it either.

And this banana budino… Why did I get two? I can't eat it all before my flight.

I will never forgive al-Qaeda for ruining bringing creamy foods home via air travel.


How old are the barf bags on this plane? I have never encountered someone who has used one. Like with Q-tips, I think a box of them will last a lifetime.

Do they expire? No way cost-cutting airlines willingly replace unused ones.


Interesting that Southwest's complimentary beverages include Coca-Cola and 7UP and not Coca-Cola and [Coca-Cola-owned] Sprite.

In-N-Out carries 7UP instead of Sprite too.

Coca-Cola Freestyle machines carry Dr. Pepper but not [Dr. Pepper-owned] 7UP. Coca-Cola Freestyle machines carry both Dr. Pepper and Mr. Pibb, though.

Pepsi owns 7UP internationally. Is [Pepsi-owned] Sierra Mist only available in America?

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