Guh. If I had only left the apartment a minute earlier, I could've caught that bus and arrived by now. But nooooo! You just had to see who won the Showcase Showdown, didn't you, Jon? [sigh] "Every 20 minutes," my ass! [checks watch] This would never happen in Japan. I bet some cripples delayed the bus. Why can't CTA have special buses for cripples? Instead of an express bus, a slow bus. No, a "mentally-challenged" bus. Better yet, force 'em all to ride trains, preferably to Birkenau. [pause] I can't hear this song amid all this traffic. Plug your fuckin' guitar in, Sam Beam! Oh here we go. London London London…is that? Finally! Figures, two buses in a row — always the case. Am I gonna fit in either one? [sigh] Glad I brought Purell…

+ French and German remakes of BBC's Office
+ Out of fucking nowhere, it's David Hasselhoff!!!