Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

15. History Potpourri (Jeopardy!, 05 Apr 21)


Honourable Mention


  • "This literally tastes like shit. And I know. Ah, the park." (Birdgirl, S01E01)
  • "That vag attacked my client." (Birdgirl, S01E01)
  • "You say 'faux' instead of 'fuh.'" (Birdgirl, S01E01)
  • ♫: "This Love" parody (Chad, S01E01)
  • "Hey, Marjorie. I…got your feminine napkin." (Chad, S01E01)
  • "Are you wearing leather shorts?" (Chad, S01E01)
  • ♫: Punky Brewster theme (Chad, S01E01)
  • "What happened, Chad?"
    "I was tricked into being a booty call and I'm freaking out now and I want— I want my mommy."
    "It's okay, Chad. Your mommy is kissing right now, but I am here for you." (Chad, S01E01)
  • "What happened?"
    "Chad's booty was called tonight." (Chad, S01E01)
  • "Please turn on my Fortnite light." (Chad, S01E01)
  • ♫: Bunny Wailer – "Dream Land" (Exterminate All the Brutes, S01E01)
  • ♫: Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings – "This Land Is Your Land" (Exterminate All the Brutes, S01E02)
  • "The Times sent this over. It's, uh, champagne."
    "It's Korbel." (Snowfall, S04E08)
  • "DEAD SHOW Tonight in SF" (Snowfall, S04E08)
  • "I realized you either join the system and become what you hate, or fight it and let it destroy you."
    "So, what's it gonna be?"
    "Well, that's just it. Now I don't have to choose. I've found the best of both worlds. Their system, my way." (Snowfall, S04E08)
  • "I'm putting all you bitches on notice right now." (Snowfall, S04E08)
  • "I'm done getting caught between the two of you. No longer a mother and wife first. Start taking care of myself." (Snowfall, S04E08)
  • Jerome's rings (Snowfall, S04E07)
  • "Tomorrow you'll wake up. Next time you won't." (Snowfall, S04E07)
  • Reginald VelJohnson voicing Principal Winslow of Reginald VelJohnson High School (Invincible, S01E05)
  • "The very concept of a Super Soldier will always trouble people. It's that warped aspiration that led to Nazis, to Ultron, to the Avengers."
    "You're talking about our friends."
    "The Avengers, not the Nazis." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E04)
  • "The desire to become a superhuman cannot be separated from supremacist ideals." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E04)
  • "Your TT would be proud of you." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E04)
  • "When I was young, we used to come here for fabulous dinners and parties." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E04)
  • "Don't engage him. He's just gonna extort you and do that stupid head tilt thing." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E04)
  • Ayo literally disarming Bucky (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E04)
  • "I can't believe he pulled an El Chapo." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E04)
  • "Power just makes a person more of themselves, right?" (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E04)
  • "My world doesn't matter to America, so why should I care about its mascot?" (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E04)
  • ♫: Försent – "Cuz × Greekazo" (Snabba Cash, S01E01)
  • Snabba Cash Season Grade: C

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: P-Valley
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: How To with John Wilson

Crawford Bock

How long until Netflix produces its own The Challenge?

Or Battle of the Netflix Stars – Noah Centineo, Jonathan Van Ness, Ali Wong…


Meanwhile, on David Cross' Wikipedia page:

4.1 Criticisms and feuds

4.1.1 Larry the Cable Guy
4.1.2 James Lipton
4.1.3 Alvin and the Chipmunks
4.1.4 Scott Stapp

Cross is friends with the Beastie Boys. He is sampled on the beginning of the group's single "Ch-Check It Out." Mike D did not believe that this was Cross' voice in the sample, and Cross says he had to perform the voice in front of Diamond to prove it was actually him.


Flimber Jurbles

A Seattle-style hot dog, sometimes referred to as a Seattle Dog, is a hot dog topped with cream cheese and sautéed onions.

Cream cheese?


Michigan hot dog – a steamed hot dog on a steamed bun topped with a meaty sauce, generally referred to as "Michigan sauce." [source]

Michigan hot dogs of upstate New York, not to be confused with Coney Island hot dogs of the state of Michigan.

Michigan sauce bears little resemblance to Detroit Coney sauce, with no offal and barely any Greek flavor, although the texture is similar to Flint sauce. [source]

Michigan sauce, Detroit sauce, Flint sauce…

Coney Island hot dog » Regional and local varieties » Michigan »

The Coney Island developed in Michigan is topped with a beef heart-based sauce, one or two stripes of yellow mustard, and diced or chopped onions.

Detroit style
Detroit style sauce is a bean-less chili sauce.

Flint style
A dry hot dog topping made with a base of ground beef heart, which is ground to a consistency of fine-ground beef. Restaurants then add chopped onions sautéed in beef tallow.

Jackson style
Jackson style uses a thick hearty sauce of either ground beef or ground beef heart. The Jackson style was late to the usage of beef heart.

Kalamazoo style
Topping served on a skinless frankfurter.

Idea: America Dog – A bacon-wrapped dirty water half-smoke topped with beef heart chili, cole slaw, cream cheese, and radioactive green relish.

Idea: Chicago Roll – Like a Rainbow Roll, but California Roll topped with Chicago-style hot dog toppings.

Idea: Seattle-style pizza – Cream cheese instead of mozzarella.

"Seattle-style" should mean "features cream cheese," like how all California-style food features avocado. Philadelphia Roll? No, Seattle Roll!


I thought these were tacos at first.

what in the matrix hell?


How To with John Wilson × The Mandalorian, because the internet.


Ty and I have been watching YouTube videos in which people debunk popular food hack/kitchen trick videos, and I'm fascinated by the hustle of it all. Collectively, said source videos and reaction videos are a net zero contribution to the world.

I wonder why creators of deceptive food hack/kitchen trick videos don't also make videos debunking them. Cut out the parasites, profit twice.

Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

14. Orgasm Review (Made for Love, S01E01)


Honourable Mention


Stray Observations

  • "Take this shit and get the fuck out of here."
    "Uh-uh— Nuh-uh. We did a lot of work to set this motherfucker up and drug him."
    "Yeah, I broke my nails putting him in the trunk, so…"
    "Come on. How about four grand? Okay. Three grand? Uh, we got babysitters for this. $500?" (Snowfall, S04E07)
  • Pouring malt liquor on grilling burger patties (Snowfall, S04E07)
  • "You looking…not as bad." (Snowfall, S04E07)
  • "Thwarted, nigga." (Snowfall, S04E07)
  • "The thing is, everybody talks when they're drowning." (Snowfall, S04E07)
  • ♫: Frank Ocean – "Bad Religion" (Genera+ion, S01E08)
  • "All of my knowledge of love is drawn from things you'd definitely judge me for."
    "Like what?"
    "Do you know Anju and Kafei from Legend of Zelda?" (Genera+ion, S01E08)
  • ♫: Lullaby "Savage" (Genera+ion, S01E08)
  • "I mean, I'm assuming whichever one we choose, whoever's gonna adopt them is someone local, and sentencing this kid to a life in Anaheim just seems straight-up criminal." (Genera+ion, S01E08)
  • "'Jesus is the reason for the season'? Are we sure we want to leave the baby here? I'm getting homeschooling vibes." (Genera+ion, S01E08)
  • "'Sunny beaches and secluded coves, Laguna is Southern California's most alluring beach town.'"
    "I don't know. Like, what kid's, like, 'Life ain't perfect, but at least I got secluded coves'?" (Genera+ion, S01E08)
  • Genera+ion Season Grade: C
  • Ray Romano fucking a sex doll (Made for Love, S01E01)
  • "Give me the bitch, bitch!" (Made for Love, S01E02)
  • "I'm crying."
    "You're not, actually, though." (Made for Love, S01E03)
  • ♫: Tim Heidecker – "Say Yes" (Made for Love, S01E03)


(Top Chef: Portland, S18E01)

  • Halo-halo (Invincible, S01E04)
  • ♫: Bazzi – "Paradise" (Invincible, S01E04)
  • "Do you know who I am?" (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E03)
  • "If I may…"
    "No!" (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E03)
  • "It is a masterpiece, James. Complete. Comprehensive. It captures the African-American experience."
    "He's out of line, but he's right." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E03)
  • "What's up with Madripoor? You talk about it like it's Skull Island." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E03)
  • "We have to fix this. I'm the only one who looks like a pimp."
    "Only an American would assume a fashion-forward Black man looks like a pimp." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E03)
  • The writer of John Wick wrote John Wick (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E03)


(The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E03)

  • "I came out first. You're supposed to follow me. […] It's in every action movie!" (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E03)
  • "I'm such a Forgetful Frankie Muniz. That's not a joke, he had a serious head injury." (Solar Opposites, S02E03)
  • "She tried to save the Na'vi while making smoking look cool again. What the fuck did you ever do?"
    "You will never be strong enough, cool enough, or confident enough to get a woman like Sigi Weave." (Solar Opposites, S02E03)
  • "Terry, for the last time, salsa is not a real apology. And you know the only food I like eating at those Mexican restaurants are those sliced radishes!" (Solar Opposites, S02E03)
  • "Wait, didn't Shlorp blow up like a new Lizzo single? Topical."
    "Yes, but this uses a temporal address that can send the letter back in time to before Shlorp went boom‐boom‐pow. I was trying to piggyback on‐on‐on your, on your reference to music." (Solar Opposites, S02E03)


(Solar Opposites, S02E03)

  • "Pete Davidson" (Solar Opposites, S02E03)


(Solar Opposites, S02E03)

  • "Are you threatening me, Idris Elba?" (Solar Opposites, S02E03)


(Solar Opposites, S02E03)

  • "I don't wanna change! I like who I am now! I like wearing women's eye shadow and murdering you!" (Solar Opposites, S02E03)
  • "It's worse than the nightmare on Helms Street, which is what they call the time a Port‐a‐Potty emptying truck tipped over on Ed Helms' private drive." (Solar Opposites, S02E04)
  • "You're not an executive story editor on the hit Fox drama Bones anymore. This is real life." (Solar Opposites, S02E04)
  • "I'm gonna work in finance because I've always wanted to be a shit head." (Solar Opposites, S02E04)
  • "It's not a blow job, sweetie. It's a blow career." (Solar Opposites, S02E04)
  • "Okay, what if I did fuck crack cocaine?" (Solar Opposites, S02E04)
  • "Yeah, I have a really important sales cum— I mean, conference balls— no, I mean a team skeeting— uh, shaftholder meeting— I mean, my shattered ass is healing—" (Solar Opposites, S02E04)
  • "They had a really good Arby's…to get fucked in." (Solar Opposites, S02E04)
  • "This is from Samuel by Sam Jackson for Kangol. It's the exact model he wore to the premiere of his Capital One commercial." (Solar Opposites, S02E05)
  • "We gotta be careful, too. 'Cause according to VeggieTales, cheating will make you a gay potato." (Solar Opposites, S02E05)
  • "Where do you shop, T.J. Minimum?" (Solar Opposites, S02E05)
  • "Can't you read?"
    "Of course I can."
    // Ron Howard: "He can't." [Arrested Development sting] (Solar Opposites, S02E05)
  • "Come out, Jen. We can go to a coffee shop that has a painting of wings on a wall, you can pose in front of it, so fun." (Solar Opposites, S02E05)
  • "Oh god, we're so sorry. A homeless guy in a Hulu sweatshirt made us do it!" (Solar Opposites, S02E05)
  • "Ooh, that's right, it's the entire series of Terriers on Blu‐Ray." (Solar Opposites, S02E05)
  • "Someone's gonna find out we're big cheaters and then they're gonna kill us just like they did with Lance Armstrong."
    "He wasn't killed, they just took one nut." (Solar Opposites, S02E05)
  • "Joe Rogan is our generation's Maya Angelou."
    "Our generation already has a Maya Angelou. It's Mark Cuban!" (Solar Opposites, S02E05)
  • "According to Peter, the, uh, Okja‐type character…" (Solar Opposites, S02E06)
  • "The prosecution claims Korvo created a giant pig thing that self‐cooked racks of award‐winning ribs out of its chest, whose blood tasted like delicious barbecue sauce, and when struck 'shat out all the fixins.'"
    "Dammit, that does sound like something I would do. Right down to the 'fixin" shits." (Solar Opposites, S02E06)
  • "He spent a few nights in the woods, then he moved on with his life, got his MFA in interpretive dance, couldn't find work, duh, so he got a job at the Apple Store with all the other people who have MFAs." (Solar Opposites, S02E06)
  • "Oh no, Magic Shell!" (Solar Opposites, S02E06)
  • "I bought some Solar Opposites masks from the Hulu Store's going‐out‐of‐business sale. I also got 15 PEN15 pens that are also dildos." (Solar Opposites, S02E06)
  • "Don't you dare mansplain the Predalien to me." (Solar Opposites, S02E07)
  • "Please, don't touch my dick when I'm dead." (Solar Opposites, S02E07)
  • "This alien is educating my things!"
    "Stop right there, you dirty alien!"
    "Oh God, I can read? What if I gain empathy? What if I learn things that force me to re-evaluate my hardline conservative opinions?" (Solar Opposites, S02E08)
  • ♫: Ke$ha – "Die Young" (Solar Opposites, S02E08)
  • Midsommar (Solar Opposites, S02E08)
  • "Holy shit, I guess we're in a 'there-can-only-be-one' Highlander-type situation."
    "Wait, I thought that show was about a hot nurse who goes back in time to get her ass eaten out?" (Solar Opposites, S02E08)
  • Solar Opposites Season Grade: C

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: P-Valley
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: How To with John Wilson

Happy Amazon Employee

News of Gag Reflex comes on the heels of an announcement that Grindr would be mounting its first original scripted series titled Bridesman, set to debut this fall.

The comedy series follows a gay bridesman as he undermines his best friend's wedding.

The six to ten-minute episodes are set to premiere on YouTube as well as in-app to Grindr's nearly 5 million daily active users. [source]

Queebi.

Grindr Sitcom Idea: Four friends – a fat, a fem, a black, and an Asian.



Sinfeld Remastered is a Seinfeld-themed horror game inspired by Resident Evil and Silent Hill.


7 Years of Lukas Graham
Shot over seven years with the intimate backstage access of a friend, this is the rare rock doc that shows the band's development and major milestones as they happen.

Who is this for?

Unauthorized Satan Shoe

I can't stop looking at this barbershop's Instagram.


ANGER FOOT is a lightning-fast hard-bass blast of kicking down doors and kicking ass.

Press E to kick
Left click to shoot
Right click to throw


Re-edit the linked dance scene in Luca Guadagnino's Suspiria to "Montero (Call Me By Your Name)."

Lil Nas X used to live on the army base in We Are Who We Are. While there, Jonathan recommended the book Call Me By Your Name to him.

"Montero (Call Me By Your Name)" is about Fraser.

A new social app that empowers and gamifies good humaning

Previously on Adam Riff™:

Who needs April Fools' Day jokes when Discovery+ exists?


I found 16 Alaska-related shows on Discovery+.

Alaska Vet.
Alaska Women Looking for Love.
Buying Alaska.
Alaska Haunting.
Alaska Proof [distillery].

Paramount+ should commission Drag Race: Alaska.


Guy Fieri keeps trying to make his uncharismatic son Hunter happen, and Food Network is too cowardly to stop him.

Thinking about how Guy didn't want to travel to SoCal to shoot Guy's Grocery Games, so Food Network built a market in Santa Rosa, CA, where he lives.

Guy should ask Food Network to revive Hannibal.


MOMENT OF TRUTH (IMDB TV)
Premieres Friday, April 2

DESCRIPTION:
The five-part series analyzes and presents new compelling information on the 1993 murder of James Jordan. The crime shocked the nation, creating a media frenzy and countless speculations and conspiracy theories.

We've reached the "Michael Jordan's dad" part of the true crime wave.

ESPN+ should commission a true sports-related crime docu-series à la Dark Side of the Ring.

Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

13. Justice League Dark (Invincible, S01E01)


Honourable Mention


Stray Observations

  • Jerome wearing a fur-collared leather robe in Little Rock (Snowfall, S04E06)
  • "Damn. Fucking my shocks up." (Snowfall, S04E06)
  • "You jelly roll motherfucker!" (Snowfall, S04E06)
  • "Hey, hey, somebody help me! I've been kidnapped by these two crazy hos!" (Snowfall, S04E06)
  • Leon struggling to slam the table (Snowfall, S04E06)
  • "Alright, looks like we are all inside the bussy." (Genera+ion, S01E06)
  • "A sorcerer is a wizard without a hat." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E02)
  • "A little time in Wakanda and you come out White Panther."
    "It's actually White Wolf." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E02)
  • "Look, I see a guy hanging out of a helicopter in tactical gear, I need a lot more than Lemar Hoskins." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E02)
  • "So are you, like, Black kid?" (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E02)
  • "Freaky Magoo" (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E02)
  • "If he was wrong about you, then he was wrong about me." (The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, S01E02)
  • Guardians of the Globe voiced by Walking Dead cast members (Invincible, S01E01)
  • ♫: DJ Shadow – "Rocket Fuel [feat. De La Soul]" (Invincible, S01E03)
  • "Oh yeah, they're making Succession cereal with all the shapes: Romans, Logans, and Purple Shivs!" (Solar Opposites, S02E01)
  • "Smell my peen! They grow the grapes in Brooklyn in the middle of a Montessori preschool." (Solar Opposites, S02E02)
  • "How the fuck were we supposed to know Debbie Liebling?" (Solar Opposites, S02E02)
  • "Infant carrots" (Solar Opposites, S02E02)
  • "Do you know what I just read in this spinning newspaper?"
    "Family Circus is still going? How is that possible? All of those kids should be dead." (Solar Opposites, S02E02)
  • "I grew these Napadoodles using techno‐organic material. They can sense cheese plates and Cards Against Humanity from miles away." (Solar Opposites, S02E02)
  • "Come on, you're a war hero. You've got the stomach for this. Plus, you were an Executive Story Editor on Bones." (Solar Opposites, S02E02)
  • "Quick, grab the scooter made from birds." (Solar Opposites, S02E02)
  • ♫: Phosphorescent – "Song For Zula" (Can't Get You Out of My Head, S01E01)
  • ♫: Nine Inch Nails – "The Worriment Waltz" (Can't Get You Out of My Head, S01E01)
  • ♫: The Mekons – "Where Were You?" (Can't Get You Out of My Head, S01E02)

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: P-Valley
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: How To with John Wilson


Looking forward: