Today is my 35th birthday.

Last month, Adam Riff™ dot com turned 17.

By my calculation, on August 17, 2018, this website will have consumed exactly half of my life.

And from August 17, 2018 on, this website will have consumed over half of my life.

Half of my life – all because I wanted to be able to joke about giant throbbing erections and execution by firing squad with impunity.

My son will be a senior in high school next year.