Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

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30. Robbin Sparkles (The Rehearsal, S01E02)

Honourable Mention

  • Experimental cut (Irma Vep, S01E07)

Stray Observations

  • </Dark Winds, S01>
  • ♫: Ramin Djawadi – "Pink + White" (Westworld, S04E04)
  • "And why can't I own a pet?"
    "Wait, that's on there? All right. Don't pay attention to that, man. That's my last client. Nigga fucked a goat." (Flatbush Misdemeanors, S02E05)
  • "You got them cigarettes I asked for?"
    "Come on, son. The fuck is this?"
    "I said get me some menthols."
    "Those are menthols, Mr. Hill."
    "Yeah, for Russian bitches. I can't smoke this shit."
    […]
    "Let me get that lighter real quick."
    "So, you're not gonna give me a Newport?"
    "Nah, man, these are for my Russian bitches. Svetlana love these. " (Flatbush Misdemeanors, S02E05)
  • "You ever had peanut butter crawfish cake?"
    "That sounds gross, man."
    "You haven't even heard the ingredients."
    "I just heard two of them." (Flatbush Misdemeanors, S02E05)
  • "nancy says your painting doesn't have enough white people in it. you should paint a hockey team." (Flatbush Misdemeanors, S02E05)
  • "That crazy motherfucker was up on seven charges of grand larceny and came in a bathrobe. The fuck, he Ghostface?" (Flatbush Misdemeanors, S02E05)
  • "See, I'm pro-Black when it's convenient, like Nike." (Flatbush Misdemeanors, S02E05)
  • "Good morning."
    "It's night." (Flatbush Misdemeanors, S02E05)
  • "Let me get the bondage consultant."
    "What the fuck is a bondage consultant?
    "This is Thorvald. We met on the Dark Net." (Irma Vep, S01E07)
  • "I know all the players! Negroponte, Noriega, Hasenfus."
    "He forgot Ed Meese, everybody!"
    "Yeah, I wasn't going to forget Ed Meese, everybody!" (Only Murders in the Building, S02E05)
  • "Red before green, you're peeing clean. Green before red, your liver's dead." (Only Murders in the Building, S02E05)
  • "So we are clear on placement?"
    "Yes, yes. It should be in the usual place between the legs."
    "Yes, and not in a separate container such as a jar or a briefcase. And not on my chin."
    "'Not on chin.'" (What We Do in the Shadows, S04E03)
  • "Oh, my cousin granted his wish to get five mics in The Source." (What We Do in the Shadows, S04E03)
  • "You guys said you wanted to circle back to some concerns about the balls?" (What We Do in the Shadows, S04E03)
  • "Your familiar has a very shrewd and incisive mind when it comes to the penis stuff." (What We Do in the Shadows, S04E03)
  • "Would you care for some Yoo-hoo?" (What We Do in the Shadows, S04E03)
  • "This is a white?"
    "This a white." (Rap Sh!t, S01E01)
  • ♫: Moneybagg Yo – "Time Today" (Rap Sh!t, S01E01)
  • "Yes, accordions. Yeah, that shit with the air in the middle!" (Rap Sh!t, S01E01)
  • ♫: Jucee Froot – "Sidewalk" (Rap Sh!t, S01E01)
  • "I told you. I know my cleavages." (Rap Sh!t, S01E02)
  • "How you gonna be a senator, and your girl is up in here rapping about gagging dick?"
    "Wait, no. We can't do that, though. Like, we in a new era of women. Shawna does not have to be Michelle."
    "I'm sorry."
    "We gonna let her be Melania." (Rap Sh!t, S01E02)
  • "Is you rapping about student loans?"
    "As. Technically, I'm rapping as the student loans."
    "Why would I want our song to be about debt?"
    "Everybody's affected by predatory lending. People are really going to feel this. Of all creeds." (Rap Sh!t, S01E02)
  • ♫: Unidentified song at 15:30 (Rap Sh!t, S01E02)
  • "You want to control how she remembers you? What are the fucking chances of that? It's the rememberers who get to decide when they're satisfied, not the remembered." (The Old Man, S01E07)
  • </The Old Man, S01>
  • "How did you feel about her flirting?"
    "We'll just say Lynne's a piece of work and leave it at that."
    "My mom's fat. We'll leave it at that." (Black Bird, S01E04)
  • "Yeah, I wanted to fucking kill her sometimes."
    "Did you think about how?"
    "Chuck her down the stairs."
    "Although, what if she hung on for a few minutes after? They do that. Particularly with neck breaks." (Black Bird, S01E04)
  • "I mean, I'm not saying that all extra-biblical texts are bad 'cause definitely like the Dead Sea Scrolls or…" (The Rehearsal, S01E02)
  • "I was just wondering, what scares you the most? In life."
    "Well…first off, it's eels." (The Rehearsal, S01E02)


(The Rehearsal, S01E02)

  • "What's your dream, like, for your life?"
    "Well, my dream has always been to play in the NBA." (The Rehearsal, S01E02)
  • "I know that the government has Sasquatch liaisons." (The Rehearsal, S01E02)
  • Truncated Alligator Lounge facsimile (The Rehearsal, S01E02)
  • Parental permission phone call flow chart (The Rehearsal, S01E02)
  • "Dick's Cheese Shop" (Solar Opposites, S03E09)
  • "What the hell happened to our Emily in Paris body suit?" (Solar Opposites, S03E09)
  • "Yumyulack, you're the moral center of dick. And Jesse, your sources suck. Why are we fucking paying for that journalism MBA from Grand Canyon University?" (Solar Opposites, S03E09)
  • "Hey, isn't this where we had our Shlorpian sеxual harassment training? Who was the hot guy who ran it? Real strong shoulders, like cum gutters on the roof, know what I'm sayin'?" (Solar Opposites, S03E09)
  • "You can't just willy-nilly invoke Taro Nedgerton." (Solar Opposites, S03E09)
  • "Hey! Remember those dicks who turned me into a gummy bear last year?"
    "It was technically a Swedish Fish. I tried to bone you in the gummy butt. It was the second craziest 9/11 of my life." (Solar Opposites, S03E09)
    "Well, they're all locked up! We can be jerks again!" [puts on lacrosse hat] (Solar Opposites, S03E09)
  • "I just hope we don't miss out on all the good hot sauce packet quips."
    "I swear if I get 'Here today, gone tamale' again, I'll have to lose faith in the dedication of the T-Bell copywriters." (Solar Opposites, S03E10)
  • "Intuition, instinct. You can follow your gut. Humans are famous for it."
    "Oh yeah, like how I always know how a woman's tweet can be better if I explain it to them." (Solar Opposites, S03E10)
  • "SodaStreams are stupid. The soda tastes weird, and the carbon dioxide fucks up your teeth." (Solar Opposites, S03E10)


"Now eat my alien ass." (Solar Opposites, S03E10)

  • "You're ruining the upholstery with your goobler diarrhea!" (Solar Opposites, S03E10)
  • "I am livid! Wait, is that a real word? Well, then I'm fucking livid."
    "Okay now, guys, let's take it easy here. Maybe we just don't know Pupes as well as we thought."
    "And I say it's livid time to find out."
    "Now he's going to use 'livid' wrong for everything." (Solar Opposites, S03E11)
  • "He eats an insane number of garlic knots, and his only source of news is Cameos from Finn Wolfhard." (Solar Opposites, S03E11)
  • "And to make sure he never comes back, I'm trapping him inside of a crystal paperweight."
    "Yeah, budd—"
    "No!"
    "Now, he can't give you bad ideas, and he'll keep our bills from flying away." (Solar Opposites, S03E11)
  • "You better stop being steam this instant or…no more playing Roblox!"
    "Was that steam monster wearing a PewDiePie hoodie?"
    "The Pupa's delinquency must be manifesting as adolescent creatures. Look out! There's one wearing Tech Fleece and listening to Future!" (Solar Opposites, S03E11)
  • "My bills! Damn it! I can't remember how much I owe in dues to the WGA North for that whole Ted 3D fiasco!" (Solar Opposites, S03E11)
  • "Guys, that Supreme steam monster sounds exactly like us."
    "Holy shit. Were we the Todd Phillips all along?" (Solar Opposites, S03E11)
  • </Solar Opposites, S03>

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