47. Republican or Not (Saturday Night Live, S47E07)

Honourable Mention

• Simu and Bowen (Saturday Night Live, S47E07)

Stray Observations

• Kyle Chandler! (Mayor of Kingstown, S01E01)

» Eminem as White Boy Rick (BMF, S01E07)

• "I looked it up and rabbits aren't supposed to eat bagels."
  "Okay, Bianca. Let the rabbit have some bagel. Those rules are for fuckheads who're gonna go to Tampa and leave a rabbit with a Big Gulp and a dozen cinnamon raisin." (Succession, S03E05)
• "Eagles Aerie out!" (Succession, S03E05)
• "And now I hear that you've dispensed with Roger's services, presumably to throw your lot in with my brother and his gang of crapulous shills?" (Succession, S03E05)
• "Because, Greg, your life is not a bagatelle." (Succession, S03E05)
• "Just call our doctor."
  "But the doctor does, uh, people?
  "Yeah, if he can do people, he can do rabbits." (Succession, S03E05)
• "First, they came for the PJs, and I said nothing. Then they come for the outsized compensation payments, you know?" (Succession, S03E05)
• "You guys off to the bathroom?"
  "What fucking business is it of yours?" (Succession, S03E05)
• "We are a complicated coalition. And Sandy is the angriest fucking vegetable."
  "All right, listen. I can salvage this. I'm on my way to talk to them."
  "Good luck. The fucking belligerent zucchini here is set to close the negotiations for good."
  "Okay, just, just hang tight, dude. Puppet Master's on it." (Succession, S03E05)
• "Okay. Uh…he's got a fucking UTI."
  "What? Seriously? Well, is that—I mean, no. It's not that fucking serious, right?"
  "What? At his age, that can make you crazy. Reagan had one and nearly nuked Belgium." (Succession, S03E05)
• "We actually don't know when he went piss-mad."
  "No, no, I suspect that he's been piss-mad for quite a while."
  "Oh, do you? The fucking Hercule Poirot of fucking piss over here." (Succession, S03E05)
• "I'm the only one who's allowed to be nasty." (Succession, S03E05)
• "Dad said no deal!"
  "No, he didn't! His urethra had wrested control from his brain!" (Succession, S03E05)
• "Gerri, we need someone sensible to talk to the, uh…President right now…urgently on an urgent personal matter."
  "I'll talk to him, the little bitch, here." (Succession, S03E05)
• "I'm just most horny when you're the most fertile, you know. I'm just vibing to your sexy window." (Succession, S03E05)
• "He's not even wearing a tie." (Succession, S03E05)
• "You're going to sue Greenpeace?" (Succession, S03E05)
• "Shiv being a bitch?" (Succession, S03E05)
• "'We need to talk.' Words you never want to hear from your doctor or your girlfriend." (Dexter, S09E02)
• "Now look at you. You're the queer Kamala." (Yellowjackets, S01E01)
• "You got it?"
  "Got six words for you, my friend. Lucy…in the Sky…with Diamonds."
  "That is, like, the least efficient way to say that." (Yellowjackets, S01E01)
• "If you come inside me, I will raise the baby out of spite and train it to become a killing machine that eventually hunts you down." (Yellowjackets, S01E01)
• "Tell me you love me. I won't hold you to it, okay?" (Yellowjackets, S01E01)
• "I wear a size nine."
  "Why you proud of that? Also, round up, nigga. Round up in public, shit!" (Insecure, S05E04)
• "And I'm just like, what does that mean? If your pussy a ghost, is my pussy a ghost?" (Insecure, S05E04)
• "You a fan of Derulo?" (Insecure, S05E04)
• "You got tattoos? Okay, so what's this one mean?"
  "The Chinese symbol for 'good dick.'" (Insecure, S05E04)
• "Should I fuck him?"
  "If you want to. What that 'nani say?"
  "'It's a yes from me, dawg.'" (Insecure, S05E04)
• "She said come around back, but hurry, because Jason just started doin' close-up magic." (Insecure, S05E04)
• "Even Black people don't like to see Black people eat fucking watermelon." (Curb Your Enthusiasm, S11E04)
• "There are no ties in optometry." (Curb Your Enthusiasm, S11E04)
• "When the exam was over, she dropped a Pirate's Booty on the floor." (Curb Your Enthusiasm, S11E04)
• "Pick up the fucking grape, Woody!" (Curb Your Enthusiasm, S11E04)
• "Those second fridges area giant waste of energy, like Las Vegas." (Joe Pera Talks With You, S03E03)
• Eating spaghetti out of a cooler (Joe Pera Talks With You, S03E03)
• "No more Spotify Premium until you start acting like a good kid." (Joe Pera Talks With You, S03E03)
• "I wish there was something I could tell Nicole, but, unless you're an adult who gets it, like, say, Billie Joe Armstrong, it will fall on deaf teen ears." (Joe Pera Talks With You, S03E03)
• The doll from Cult of Chucky with burnt fingers (Chucky, S01E06)
• Jennifer Tilly playing poker (Chucky, S01E06)
• Cape Fear (Chucky, S01E06)
• R.I.P. every character's mother (Chucky, S01E06)
• "They have the Au Cheval burger here." (South Side, S02E04)
• "You know, inspiration can strike you at the oddest time, just like your mother." (South Side, S02E05)
• "It's okay. It's okay, Vic Mensa." (South Side, S02E06)
• I went home with this big-ass nigga, LaCarver. He said he was named after LaDainian Tomlinson and George Washington Carver." (South Side, S02E06)
• "Oh, snap. Scottie Pippen is kicking it with Da Brat."
  "I wanna see him."
  "I know. Look, you can watch The Last Dance again." (South Side, S02E06)
• "We were going to finally prove that giardiniera was invented by a Black man."
  "I knew it!"
  "Here's here today. His name is Gil Cousins."
  "Alright."
  "He did not bring any giardiniera." (South Side, S02E06)
• "And on that corner where y'all shot Lil' Reese…"
  "Yes."
  "…you gon' make a left." (South Side, S02E06)
• "Get him out of here! Take him out in the alley! Beat his ass. Pour pineapple Ciroc on his wounds, okay?" (South Side, S02E06)
• "Mr. Trinidad James! Alive and okay." (South Side, S02E06)
• "They played their song 'Take Her Out Tonight' on Fake Shore Drive, and people love it, man." (South Side, S02E06)
• "You remember when I was gonna be the hood's answer to Tim McGraw?"
  "Yeah, of course I do. You wore those beautiful chaps, man." (South Side, S02E06)
• "Man dem, Top Boy, run dat choon!" (South Side, S02E06)
• "Is this real D'ussé? I specifically said that I wanted Evan Williams in D'ussé bottles." (South Side, S02E06)
• "It was cool, but, you know, at the end of the day, I was still a little bit like, 'Please stop blowing up my phone every five minutes, Jesse Jackson!'" (South Side, S02E06)
• "Ladies and gentlemen, it's the moment you all been waiting for. Get ready to say 'nigga' way too many times. Put your hands together for Mr. Trinidad James!" (South Side, S02E06)
• [sniffing] "Evan Williams?" (South Side, S02E06)
• "What's a casino? Are you kidding me? It's like, um, if the happiest place on Earth had a baby with the saddest place." (Marvel's Hit-Monkey, S01E03)
• "Stop using grooming as a weapon!" (Marvel's Hit-Monkey, S01E05)
• "Who's Tom Petty? I mean, he's like if, uh…if weed as a person." (Marvel's Hit-Monkey, S01E06)
• ♫: Michael Nau – "While You Stand" (Marvel's Hit-Monkey, S01E08)
• "I got to the afterlife, and it was an awesome place. Fire everywhere. Super dramatic. Uh, you know, little bit like Reno, but better. Slayer playing. Dragons everywhere." (Marvel's Hit-Monkey, S01E10)
• Marvel's Hit-Monkey Season Grade: C
• "I just don't want an accident. Some loyalist in the hallway grabs you, smacks your delightfully shaped skull against a wall until it shatters and caves in, killing you and Paul. You know, can you imagine how upset I'd be? I'd fuck your dead body for days. I want you to know that."
  "Jesus."
  "Exactly. My love is strong." (The Great, S02E01)
• "Oh. You're doing the frog?"
  "Yes, I'm doing the frog."
  "It is discredited hocus pocus. Instead I will insert this sage bundle into the royal cunt and that will do what the frog purports to." (The Great, S02E01)
• "Don't be a blamer, George, or I will never fuck you with my tongue so that you literally melt in my mouth again." (The Great, S02E01)
• "I thank you, but I have dirt to eat and my own counsel to take."
  "Head not heart, Catherine."
  "Reason not rage, Orlo."
  "There's a worm in that clump." (The Great, S02E01)
• "But the way she was cruel to him broke something in him. A child should float in a bubble of love so that nothing can touch them, at least while they're young."
  "Was that what you did with Igor?"
  "I did. I at least know I did that."
  "How did he die?"
  "Drowned in the lake." (The Great, S02E01)
• "I'll make a little weed salsa verde." (The Great, S02E01)
• "The more you toy with me, the harder my cock gets. There are softer oak trees." (The Great, S02E01)
• ♫: Perfume Genius – "Queen" (The Great, S02E01)
• "Oh, let us kill him slowly until he realizes he's been abandoned by God." (The Great, S02E02)
• "Are you crying?"
  "If it will help, yes." (The Great, S02E02)
• "'Give her your fear as you gave it me. Fuck with her, you fuck with me.'" (The Great, S02E02)
• "I assume you came with a question, as I know you would have the good grace not to interrupt a man who has a bowl of wine." (The Great, S02E02)
• "Are you sucking on a nail?"
  "I am, and I will not be shamed." (The Great, S02E04)
• "If it precipitates war, I'm all for it."
  "What a surprising position for you to take." (The Great, S02E04)
• "Call me when you feel the need for masturbation." (The Great, S02E04)
• "I say each wall different. You know, green for the love of nature. That one will be yellow for the sunshine of a new day, then this one dark red as blood for his future. Then one, whatever the color of crispy pork is." (The Great, S02E04)
• "Out of bounds, Tatyana. He's on cum patrol!" (The Great, S02E04)
• "He has us in a pincer movement. We can wriggle, but how do we break free?"
  "I thought the answer was next."
  "More a summation of the position." (The Great, S02E05)
• "You used to eat crotch bread yourself." (The Great, S02E05)
• ♫: Angel Olsen – "Shut Up Kiss Me" (The Great, S02E05)
• "I see, you are to toy with me longer. It is a mean streak I do not appreciate, even though I appreciate them generally, and it is dull, as we could be having more fun, and much varied fornication and good times eating chocolate‐dipped grapes while we bathe together and I toe‐fuck you." (The Great, S02E06)
• "One never forgets one's wet nurse. Half the people in this room have drunk her milk." (The Great, S02E06)
• "A boy should not see his mother fucked in the face." (The Great, S02E08)
• "We just need to ride her out. She will get bored of venison schnitzel and leave." (The Great, S02E08)

» Gillian Anderson licking a fig (The Great, S02E08)

• "However, the indelible imprint of the royal cunt cannot be faked." (The Great, S02E08)
• "I bless this ground. May it be left empty and the sounds we hear in a few days' time are the insane pained shrieks of woman giving birth to a wailing, shitting child, gifted by God with health and wealth…rather than the images of the dead grey carcasses of your beloved." (The Great, S02E08)
• "Who a woman marries defines her life, only kings for mine." (The Great, S02E08)
• "What tree are you imagining us against?"
  "Oh, uh, the birch." (The Great, S02E08)
• "You have the most beautiful skin. Sitting here, I was overwhelmed by a desire to razor it off and make wallpaper from it." (The Great, S02E08)
• "Killing, pillaging, and they will eventually take it if we do not respond. It‐it‐it's like a pie. You take a bite, you want to keep taking another."
  "Well, the pie analogy is quite telling." (The Great, S02E08)
• "You are fond of Peter. And why not? Handsome as hell. He's a taste one wants in one's mouth." (The Great, S02E08)
• "I gave him a small bit of foie gras before. He made a sound like a dove coming." (The Great, S02E09)
• "I insert this in you. You hold it up there until your walls naturally contract around it, re-tightening the royal cunt." (The Great, S02E09)
• "We can beg. Well, Agnes can. I have this knee that clicks when I get on my knees."
  "Whereas I love getting on my knees."
  "You used to." (The Great, S02E09)
• ♫: Love – "Everybody's Gotta Live" (The Great, S02E09)
• "In case you can't see, I am in the middle of fucking this solider while he is being slightly asphyxiated by a macaron." (The Great, S02E10)
• The Great Season Grade: C

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: The Underground Railroad
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: What We Do in the Shadows