Take Off Your Pants and Jacket

What are these mysterious boosts they put in your drinks at Jamba Juice? They claim these boosts help your body absorb more of what it needs (crack?), what with being chock full of vitamins, minerals, amino acids, and herbs, but dammit, those sacks of powder behind the counter look like ground-up sheetrock. Do these boosts even contribute to your health? I'm still waiting for that ginseng and gingko biloba in the Strawberries Wild I had yesterday to energize my mind and body. Energy boost, my ass. Sounds like the move of a Mighty Morphin' Power Ranger. I know, I'm so not "hip with it." Why else would I find the following joke hilarious? Vita! Energy! Protein! Immunity! Fiber! Femme! Captain…Planet! Hehe.

By the way, Coldbusters don't work.

If there's any artist who deserves an award for most satisfying music video library, it's Fatboy Slim. Mr. Norman Cook has yet to make a crappy video. Let's reminisce:
"Going Out Of My Head"
the story of a boombox in the old school 1980s
"The Rockafeller Skank"
visions of disco cowboy culture
"Gangster Tripping"
five minutes of exploding objects
"Praise You"
the Torrance Community Dance Troupe (led by Spike Jonze) dances in front of the Mann Bruin theater here in Westwood
"Sunset (Bird Of Prey)"
Lyndon Johnson's infamous daisy girl television campaign advertisement + skydiving
"Weapon Of Choice"
Christopher Walken dances in an empty hotel
The "Weapon Of Choice" video, directed by Spike Jonze, is now in heavy rotation on MTV and MTV2. Watch it. I say it's a lock for video of the year.

Adam Duritz (of Counting Crows) and Babyface wrote the songs for the Josie And The Pussycats movie. Dude, that's fucked up.

Brush your teeth every day or you're probably gonna need this.

I see junior college in this kid's future.

Somebody explain this to me.

This just may be the ugliest website on the internet.

When people talk about watercolor, this is what they mean.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *