"it's gonna getcha"
![](https://assets.adamriff.com/images/dopenose.jpg)
Heil Seinfeld!
![](https://assets.adamriff.com/images/michaeljackson.jpg)
Where does Michael Jackson pick his nose? From a catalog. I thought his penis got smaller as his body got whiter, but apparently, he went and shrunk another body part.
![](https://assets.adamriff.com/images/sarahjessicaparker.jpg)
My reaction to a camera panning up from her feet to her head: "Yes…yes…yes…NO!!!" The nose ruins everything. That, and her refusal to be shown naked on television.
![](https://assets.adamriff.com/images/harrisonford.jpg)
Katy says the crooked nose adds to his "rugged charm." I say that it looks like he has a miniature penis planted between his eyes…and it hangs to the right!
![](https://assets.adamriff.com/images/owenwilson.jpg)
Was Owen Wilson dropped on his face as a baby?
![](https://assets.adamriff.com/images/barbrastreisand.jpg)
She only allows herself to be photographed on her left side. Like it makes a difference…
Aaron: All your insults and your curses make me feel like I'm not a person.
Jon: Oh grow up.