AOL Marketing Department:
—Gentlemen, the Super Bowl is approaching. We bought some airtime during the game. Anyone have any ideas for commercials?
—I like those commercials for Ratchet and Clank. What about copying them with — get this — the stars of American Chopper?
—Brilliant! I love it! We'll make Apple's "1984" clip look like a student film! All right. Second order of business: Does anyone use AOL anymore?

—Choose to vote.
—Choose to vote.
—Choose to vote.
Jessica Simpson:
—Choose to PARTY!!!

Colin on the Super Bowl halftime show:
—this is "we couldn't get outkast"

Adam and I:
—justin/janet is the new britney/madonna
—oh totally
—can't wait for the leno jokes
—and the o'reilly censure
—and the same pictures to appear on every young male's shitty blog
—along with search engine phrases like "janet jackson's super bowl halftime nipple slip!" in the title bars to attract unwarranted traffic
—which is ironic, using what someone else did for attention to get attention
—but this one makes even less sense
—one boob sorta flopping out
—that's like if timberlake had a new album coming out and he did a texas belt buckle on the billboard music awards
—why would putting your balls over the top of your pants make any sense

—at this year's video music awards
—jennifer lopez better give birth on stage to a stillborn baby boy which ja rule proceeds to rape dressed as the pope while j. lo screams "ben, it's yours!" into the camera with a flood of tears on her face