Would you please send me a Bird Flu sandwich?

Degrassi: The Next Generation sixth season news!

Ashley, Craig and Sean return. Joey and Caitlin do not.

For the first time, the Degrassi series will follow its graduates as they enter university and discover life beyond high school. The younger class, who are now in their final year of high school, get caught up in a vicious school rivalry that will have life-altering effects on some of its students. In fact, this year a member of the regular cast will die. [source]

Ellie embarks on a hot new romance with an older man while Jimmy, confined to a wheelchair, explores new ways to deal with his sexuality. After a tragic accident, one student will end up in jail, and a 16-year-old single mom graces the halls of the school as a new student. [source]

A vicious rivalry, paraplegic sex and a 16-year-old single mom — this is why I love Degrassi. Paige already dated an older man though. Her teacher, to be exact. Perhaps Ellie's older man is an uncle.

I hear the tragic accident is a drunk driving death. It'd be funny if Terri returned only to be hit by a car.

How quickly people forget "She Has a Girlfriend Now" by Reel Big Fish.

Yes, I know it's set at a homecoming dance and not a prom, but so is the video for "Dance, Dance."

Stephen Colbert's 2006 Knox College Commencement Address
"Now you are leaving here. And this leads me to a question that just isn't asked enough at commencements. Why are you leaving here? This seems like a very nice place. They have a lovely web site."

Family Guy creator Seth McFarlane's 2006 Harvard University Class Day Address
A webcast in…Real Media? Jesus fuckin' Christ, Harvard!

[in Peter Griffin's voice]
"As I look out on this sea of black Asian faces, I think to myself one thought: Take that, Hitler! […] Meg's got the look of a Harvard gal, but I'm not sure she's got the brains goin' on."

[in Quagmire's voice]
"I've banged chicks in every school in the Ivy League except Harvard. You are by far the toughest to get into."

Whitney Houston's 2006 East Southern University Commencement Address