Pathetic Smelly Geek

The MPAA asked for only a few nips and tucks to guarantee [Grindhouse]'s R rating, and they mostly involve Eli Roth's fake trailer for a slasher film called Thanksgiving, which featured a scene of a topless cheerleader being impaled on a knife while doing a split on a trampoline. [source]

Eli responds:

A full-frontal labia shot of a girl landing on a knife seemed like no problem to me.

Then:

They let me keep the turkey sex. He's having sex with a turkey. It's a cooked turkey with a decapitated head on top of it, so it's more of a turkey/human hybrid, really.

Then:

I look like Sylar!


Mr. Tarantino, can I interest you in some French-Canadian friends?

Soon to be a feature-length film!


Darian rummages through a pile of zombie corpses and pulls one out.

"I need a knife, a hammer and a cane."

He stabs the knife through the back of the corpse's neck and out its mouth.

He hammers the cane through the back of the corpse's head and out its right eye socket.

He slides a telescope through the tunnel in the corpse's skull and the barrel of a gun through its mouth from behind.

He shields himself behind the corpse and…

That's all I have so far.

I'm considering a rocket crotch and detachable grenade arms (yank one off and throw).