Please turn me on I'm Mr. Coffee with an automatic drip

How I spent my summer vacation, Freckles.

Not again, I thought. I'm cursed. The Seth-Rogen-in-a-lead-role curse.

I tried to enjoy Pineapple Express, but theatre 11's soundsystem didn't want me to.

quietLOUDquiet, more quiet than LOUD. Muffled dialogue — "What did he say?"

The same sound problem affected my enjoyment of Knocked Up.

"The sound in theatre 11 is jacked. I can't concentrate on the film."
"I'll refund your money, sir."
"Thank you. By the way, $8.25 for a matinee?"

I intended to see The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2, but it was sold out.

Before the (one-third of a) film, I tried Jamba Juice's Chunky Strawberry Smoothie (oxymoron?). It tasted like what I imagine the slop on Big Brother tastes like. Strawberries and peanut butter do not mix.

This week on The Secret Life of the American Teenager (in a parallel universe):

Way more entertaining than Mad Men.

Dancing at Yahoo!
Now you know where the hell Matt is

Return to Sleepaway Camp: October 14th
LAN Party Massacre
The Culkin brothers: before and after meth
Hamlet (Facebook News Feed Edition)
Big Boi: "To get your dick sucked to a Conway Twitty record is something else."

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