Forgive me, Charley Parker

I stumbled upon my high school senior thesis.


I spent 10 pages comparing myself to Jack Kerouac.

For my senior thesis.

My thesis was that I was similar to Jack Kerouac.


It's inexplicable, self-aggrandizing tripe, and I received an A+! 100/100!

In retrospect, my beloved AP Lit teacher may have been an enabler…

The avatars on Adam Riff™ are Beat Generation-themed.

Guess who I am.

The Best/Worst of SkyMall 2008
The 47 Most Diabolical Video-Game Villains of All Time
A.J. Burnett used to wear nipple rings.
Burger King's Meat-Scented Body Spray
the funniest shit ever


  1. hugo 17 Dec 08 at 04:48

    just look at it this way: had you turned that in for a college term paper, you would have gotten an A for style and F for pretension, which would average out to a C.

    i know not of one ap english teacher who wasnt an enabler. theyre all hoping to breed genius and fill the void of not achieving their own grade of success on their own. who gives a shit, anyway? high school was and remains a joke. PONTIFICATION OVER.

  2. hugo 17 Dec 08 at 04:50

    oh, and, for the record, at least youll die knowing you didnt write a paper defending 'lies: and the lying liars who tell them' for your senior thesis. FUCK I HATE MYSELF RIGHT NOW, OPEN WOUNDS, MAN, OPEN WOUNDS

  3. KM 17 Dec 08 at 14:22

    Maybe you should start popping some Benzedrine before writing posts, just to really get in the spirit.


Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *