4th Grade Dropout

"I just need to drop off a package, and the adjacent handicapped spot is open."
"What if two handicapped drivers show up though?"
"Put on your sunglasses and act oblivious to your missing placard."
"I highly doubt two handicapped drivers will show up within a minute."

At Costco today, I saw a man buy a slice of pepperoni pizza and then waste 20+ napkins blotting grease off it.

If grease bothers you that much, I thought, let the pizza congeal, or don't buy pizza to begin with!

I'm surprised that no one has yet invented a uselessly functional sponge for pizza grease.

Idea: Absorbent, synthetic disks that you scatter on pizzas before baking and remove before eating – smoppings.

"What did your secret Santa gift you?"

"It's like a Munny for the Wii set."

"I can't recall any other party game adaptations of toys…"

Operation Munny (via Custom Toys)

Pecan Pie Pancakes at IHOP
15 Ludicrous Straight-to-DVD Sequels That Actually Exist

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