"What's with all the Meg Whitman signs out front?"
"They're Halloween decorations! I tried, unsuccessfully, to get other signs – Sharron Angle, Carl Paladino…"

"The supermarket was out of Halloween cakes, so I bought a Giants cake. Same colours."
"Who is the market for Giants cakes, besides parents of children with birthdays in late October?"

"Why do you have a beer bong in your bathroom?"
"Oh. It's for peeing with a boner."

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