Jon: Do you know anyone in the United Kingdom?
Steven: Nope.
Jon: I need to buy a song from the UK iTunes Store for Adam Riff™'s year-end mixtape.
Steven: You can't find it on the web?
Jon: Illegally, only webrips. Legally, only available to UK residents.
Steven: http://www.7digital.com/artist/xxxxxxxxxx
Jon: UK only.
Steven: I have the song, but I'm not sure if it's good quality.
Steven: How can I tell?
Steven: Ah, never mind. It's shitty quality.
Jon: If it was 2002, I could probably buy it as an import CD single.

Jon: Oof. $100 for Snow Leopard on Amazon!
McKern: I think I still have it.
McKern: I can send you a disk image.
Jon: Never mind. I can buy it directly from Apple for $20.
Jon: Oh, but my MacBook's optical drive stopped functioning after I slipped on an icy sidewalk at Sundance and landed on my backpack.
McKern: *sigh*

Jon: Do you know anyone in the United Kingdom?
Steven: Sadly, no.
Steven: You still looking for that song, eh?

Jon: Oh. Don't overwrite the Twenty Eleven theme folder. I'm not using a child theme. I modified Twenty Eleven directly and can't create a child theme without first figuring out what I modified.
McKern: GOD, why did you do that?
McKern: If you knew how to use diff and patch, you could figure out the delta and bash it into a child theme relatively easily.
Jon: Relatively easily, if I could code functions from scratch.
McKern: Learn to be a real code monkey, Jon Yu.
Jon: That is not what I signed up for!

Today, I finally join the ranks of smartphone users.

650-515-6883.

[sends first text message] "Do you know anyone in the United Kingdom?"

…aaaaand he's currently 'shrooming.