Adam Riff™

39. Drifters (Cake, S01E01)

Stray Observations

• "I'm gonna move to Malibu Beach, shave my pussy, learn to surf."
  "Shave your pussy? Why you gonna shave your pussy?"
  "So I can surf faster, Jesse! All y'all trying to suppress me, tell me I can't shave stuff." (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E06)
• "Don't shave your pussy. Your time will come." (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E06)
• "She can know who George Washington was and still fuck." (The Deuce, S03E03)
• "I don't give a fuck! Frisée fucking Lardon!" (The Deuce, S03E03)
• "Look, some dickhead broke into your apartment and attacked you. That's gotta super scary. I mean, a stranger once grabbed my boob outside a Sam Goody, so I get it." (American Horror Story, S09E02)
• "Do you want to know the other great thing about God? You can use him to explain why something happened, but you can also use him to explain why you did something. Even something horrible. Isn't that great?"
  "So I don't have to feel bad for anything I do?"
  "Not if you're doing God's work." (American Horror Story, S09E02)
• "Dude, go first."
  "Fuck you! Why me?"
  "You're a world-class athlete. You're faster than all of us."
  "I do the fucking pommel horse!" (American Horror Story, S09E02)
• "So let's kick things off with our official Bad Place song."
  ♫ "1-877-KARS for Kids…" ♫ (The Good Place, S04E01)
• "I tried talking to her, but it was the dullest conversation I have ever had, and this is coming from someone who once split a Xanax with Peter Sarsgaard." (The Good Place, S04E01)

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: Succession
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: The Other Two

38. "Misbehavin'" (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E05)

Honourable Mention

• "We Here For You" (Succession, S02E06)
• Opening credits (American Horror Story, S09E01)

Stray Observations

• "You don't really hear much about syphilis these days. Very much the, uh, the MySpace of STDs." (Succession, S02E06)
• "Hey, uh, big fan, uh, of, of all your money." (Succession, S02E06)
• "You doin' the ol' cocaine?" (Succession, S02E06)

(The Righteous Gemstones, S01E05)

• "Well, like Patrick Swayze said, 'Opinions vary.'" (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E05)
• "Look at that. That is a ninja star with a booger on it. That's beautiful, son." (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E05)
• Christopher Durang (The Deuce, S03E02)
• James Franco kissing himself (The Deuce, S03E02)

(MasterChef, S10E24/25)

• "Fuck the IOC." (American Horror Story, S09E01)
• "This Might Help" (South Side, S01E10)
• "Why do we have to re-invent the wheel? This is Chicago. Can't we just do another shooting?" (South Side, S01E10)
• South Side Season Grade: C

(Top Boy, S03E05)

• Top Boy Season Grade: C

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: Succession
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: The Other Two

Looking forward:

37. Tribute song to bring Stephanie home (South Side, S01E08)

Stray Observations

• Kendall shit the bed (Succession, S02E05)
• Satanist dance (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E04)
• "I bet you money that that was his semen load." (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E04)
• "'ATL was dirty, dirty, for sure-y.'"
  "'ATL' is a film starring T.I. Chad, the fellas, and I were watching the film, and Chad was commenting on how large the breasts of some of the African-American actresses were in the film."
  "Yeah, a lot, a lot, they were huge." (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E04)
• CES (The Deuce, S03E01)
• "That name, Maple, is that, uh, I'm assuming that's from the Bible?"
  "No, it's from syrup." (South Side, S01E08)
• "Hey, guys, they're out of tabbouleh. Are you guys cool with baba ghanoush and, like, some grape leaves?"
  "Man, you know I don't like grapes and leaves together." (South Side, S01E08)
• "He's also the reason I'm afraid of all white substances."
  "Oh, hold on, flag on the play. Do you want me to cancel the tzatziki then?"
  "No, that, that doesn't count. It has those little green things in it." (South Side, S01E08)
• Jeff Tweedy (South Side, S01E08)
• Snowfall Season Grade: B
• Getting coffee (Top Boy, S03E02)

The New AR™TV World Drama Champion: Succession
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: The Other Two

36. Unquotable Eulogy (Succession, S02E04)

Stray Observations

• "A person can definitely fit through that window. A small person. An attack child." (Succession, S02E04)
• "Very well. I accept your blackmail." (Succession, S02E04)
• "We are so grateful for this opportunity to worship and praise His name here in this place that used to be a Sears." (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E03)
• "We in that Sears and we ain't going nowhere." (The Righteous Gemstones, S01E03)
• "There's a lot of shit out here that make me mad too. White subtitles. When the characters go outside, you can't even really see it. I mean, they should be yellow. You feel me?" (South Side, S01E07)
• "It should be looking like ankle foreskin down there." (South Side, S01E07)
• "It should say 'Ed Lover's Cold Spades Tournament Featuring Wings Prepared by Ed Lover.' That would end all the confusion." (South Side, S01E07)

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: Snowfall
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: The Other Two