Adam Riff™

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11. Reality Bites (Yellowjackets, S03E06)

Stray Observations

• "Sawatdee, never." (The White Lotus, S03E04)
• </Invincible, S03>
• "Nothing can break us up, hon. I mean, can you imagine the meltdown on the internet if we did?" (Harley Quinn, S05E09)
• "And I know, right now, I wish that guy 24, was real, because 24 can do anything."
  "Immediately unhelpful again."
  "You're talking about Kiefer Sutherland?"
  "Yeah, yeah. That's who I said. 24! A real freak, who always knows how to get out of a jam." (Harley Quinn, S05E09)
• "Uh, let me call you back, Bruce. I have to, uh…pee. Don't wanna get a UTI."
  […]
  "You said you'd call back."
  "Sorry. Turns out I also had to…shit." (Harley Quinn, S05E09)
• ♫: Aurora – "Through the Eyes of a Child" (Adolescence, S01E04)
• </Adolescence, S01>

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10. Invincibles (Invincible, S03E07)

Stray Observations

• "Wait, are…are you a Republican?"
  "No! I'm an independent." (The White Lotus, S03E03)
• "Probably should have just let me have the Wii." (Paradise, S01E08)
• </Paradise, S01>
• ♫: The Vines – "Get Free" (Daredevil: Born Again, S01E02)
• "Oh, I just farted. Did you guys hear that? Yogurt gives me the toots. Yogurt toots." (Mythic Quest, S04E07)
• "How could anyone hate Lex Luthor?"
  "I want to wax that head of his until I can see my coochie in it." (Harley Quinn, S05E08)
• </The Traitors [USA], S03>
• "Failing upwards is for white boys." (Deli Boys, S01E01)
• "Why are you collecting garbage pretzels?" (Deli Boys, S01E02)
• "You stick your finger in it and then you smell your fingers. If it smells like poop, then I'll die of the worst infection ever. Go."
  "Who told you that?"
  "It was on Better Call Saul, man. You didn't watch Better Call Saul?"
  "No, I don't have AMC+."
  "You can buy every season on Prime Video."
  "But I'm already paying a subscription fee, Raj. I'm not gonna pay more for a specific show just on principle." (Deli Boys, S01E02)
• "Wait, Charlie's your boyfriend? I thought he was your dad. He's like 90."
  "Yeah, and I'm the twink. What's your point?" (Deli Boys, S01E02)
• "Look at the wrapper. It expired in 2021."
  "The best-selling prepackaged cake in all of Philadelphia? That's fishy." (Deli Boys, S01E02)
• "What are you doing down there?"
  "I just came down to…masturbate." (Deli Boys, S01E03)
• "Hey, my peepee's not scared. It's actually very brave."
  "Easy, man, you got a good peepee." (Deli Boys, S01E04) 15:01
• "We can't let these Paki Blinders see us." (Deli Boys, S01E06)
• "He sent me an email, clearly written by AI."
  "That's actually kind of impressive. I've seen him try to use a computer." (Deli Boys, S01E07)
• </Deli Boys, S01>

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9. Disaster Class (Paradise, S01E07)

Stray Observations

• "Fold like a Democrat. Cerritos is a very Republican area, FYI." (Mythic Quest, S04E06)
• "You know, you got a diamond on your ear, I got my gem in Cerritos."
  "The diamond probably costs more." (Mythic Quest, S04E06)
• "So go out there and show your younger sister—"
  "Older."
  "Really?"
  "Yeah."
  "Okay. Well, just go out there and show her who's winning, not just at this baby shower, but in life." (Mythic Quest, S04E06)
• "I mean, where the fսck am I?"
  "Cerritos, bro."
  "90701."
  "Right off the 605."
  "Next to the 91."
  "Technically, it's Artesia, so…"
  "Hey, don't start with the Artesia stuff. That's a gerrymandering thing." (Mythic Quest, S04E06)
• "I mean, the male body can withstand a muumuu. I wouldn't mind a menmuu."
  "Hey, you got to stop pitching the menmuu. We talked about this."
  "It's an untapped market."
  "No." (Abbott Elementary, S04E15)
• "No guinea pig should have to face Timberlands, Jacob." (Abbott Elementary, S04E15)
• "Ava gave me these jeans. Mm. Said a man named Florida wrote a song about them." (Abbott Elementary, S04E15)
• "Nothing says Christmas like grouting." (Severance, S02E07)

Stray Observations

• "I love your teeth."
  "Thank you."
  "You're from England, right?" (The White Lotus, S03E01)
• "Yeah, you'll notice a lot of bald white guys in Thailand. The locals call them LBHs – losers back home." (The White Lotus, S03E01)
• </Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man, S01>
• "Fry that baby!"
  "What? Fry it?"
  "Hurry, Pop. There's customers waiting."
  "Okay. This makes me feel really weird."
  "Pop, you gotta flip the baby. The baby is burning." (Mythic Quest, S04E05)
• "Why is the baby shooting at me?"
  "I didn't have a ton of time to, like, recode the entire thing." (Mythic Quest, S04E05)
• ♫: Limp Bizkit – "Nookie" (Yellowjackets, S03E03)
• ♫: The Cure – "Cold" (Yellowjackets, S03E03)

Stray Observations

• "You look like you walked out of Sundance."
  "Wait. Was that a compliment or…?" (Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man, S01E06)
• "Okay, just so y'all know, earlier when you had called her 'Beetlejuice,' I think what you actually meant was Lydia. That's the girl who…"
  "Just count." (Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man, S01E07)
• "Guys, guys, so much can happen in a year. Haven't you seen Rent?" (Abbott Elementary, S04E14)
• ♫: Joji – "Your Man" (Invincible, S03E04)
• "My father always said, 'No ship can take you further than an internship.'"
  "I can see why someone murdered him." (Harley Quinn, S05E05)
• "No one leaves till we solve this."
  "Uh, maybe the butler did it!"
  "Oh shit! She cracked the case!"
  "Honey, the butler's dead."
  […]
  "Enough! Harley Quinn, you murdered Alfred Butler."
  "Okay. That can't actually be his last name, right?"
  […]
  "Sucks that the guy who'd clean this up is dead, am I right? Nothing? Okay." (Harley Quinn, S05E05)
• "Your butler is Batman's C-tier sidekick? The Macaroni? What is your scrawny kid? Robin?"
  "That's ridiculous."
  "Don't even know who Robin is." (Harley Quinn, S05E05)
• "We can short-circuit his thingy."
  "Wait, I'm sorry. You want to short-circuit his penis?"
  "No! His ankle bracelet."
  "Oh. That makes more sense."
  "We gotta get him into the shower and get his thingy wet."
  "Wait, his penis?" (Harley Quinn, S05E05)
• "Thank you for your attendance and your participation. You may now briefly partake in Irving's fruit head." (Severance, S03E05)
• "I'm trouble. I've lit dicks on fire." (Yellowjackets, S03E01)
• ♫: Cake – "I Will Survive" (Yellowjackets, S03E02)