Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

33. 5 out of 5 (Corporate, S03E04)

Stray Observations

  • "Look, the mayor's office can expedite a foreclosure in the case of properties that they consider a community blight."
    "Community blight? Do you know how many hoes I done put through school?" (P-Valley, S01E05)
  • ♫: Renni Rucci – "Elevators" (P-Valley, S01E05)
  • "What you in here for?"
    "I had an ounce of weed on me, and I had to put it in my baby's diaper."
    "And you?"
    "I slit somebody neck."

    "I got a DUI."
    "Oh, that ain't so bad."
    "After I cheated on my husband with his…with his mama."
    "What the fuck?" (P-Valley, S01E05)
  • "Is you fuckin' Uncle Clifford?" (P-Valley, S01E05)
  • "Look, now, I done been in a whole lot of hole-in-the-walls, but I ain't never lost no paperwork up in no coochie." (P-Valley, S01E05)
  • "Now, you finish it before I do…nigga." (P-Valley, S01E05)
  • "Oi, Kevin is so buff. When I see him, I feel a pebble in my clit bouncing off the upper left side." (I May Destroy You, S01E10)
  • ♫: Phazz – "About Her" (I May Destroy You, S01E10)

The New AR™TV World Drama Champion: P-Valley
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: What We Do in the Shadows

Tony Hawk's Burrito

When Circa opens in October, it becomes the first Las Vegas casino and resort to ban underage visitors.

Circa plans to be an adults-only experience, open only to those 21 and older. [source]

Look at this fucking pool deck:

The future of theatrical exhibition?

Summer movie season would be lit. Oscar season…not so much.

Each of the six pools features a different temperature, ranging from 78 to 94 degrees. On the fifth level, pools come heated at 104 degrees on colder days.

A Black Friday rush to the 86° pool.

Stadium Swim also has its own food from Michigan restaurateurs Paul Saginaw, Chris Sotiropoulos, and Grace Keros.

Co-founder of Zingerman's and owners of American Coney Island.

Wet Ass P-word

Thinking about the timeline in which CBS picked up How I Met Your Dad and Greta Gerwig is entering her seventh season.

Jason Segel made Forgetting Sarah Marshall and The Muppets while on How I Met Your Mother, so Greta could still make Lady Bird and Little Women while on the show.

Unlike Jason, however, when Greta wants to leave the show, because she's the main character, CBS can't negotiate one more season with her mostly separated from the rest of the cast.

Greta negotiates a series finale film, which she writes and directs?

Rory: The show runs for three more seasons with Elisha Cuthbert playing Sally.

Anders Holm, Andrew Santino, Tiya Sircar, and Drew Tarver are a helluva supporting cast.

Thinking about the timeline in which Greta Gerwig's next film is How I Met Your Dad starring Saoirse Ronan and not a Barbie movie.

Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

32. Raw Underground (WWE Raw, 03 Aug 20)

Honourable Mention

  • Sex scene (P-Valley, S01E04)
  • Sex scene (Maxxx, S01E03)

Stray Observations

  • "Ooh-whee, girl. I don't need no crack with a voice like that." (P-Valley, S01E04)
  • "Don't blaspheme in front of me."
    "Nigga, you ain't God." (P-Valley, S01E04)
  • "Well, Miss Mississippi, you sure named after the right river, 'cause your ass can't hold water for shit." (P-Valley, S01E04)
  • "Hooch on." (P-Valley, S01E04)
  • ♫: Kelly Rowland – "Motivation [feat. Lil Wayne]" (P-Valley, S01E04)
  • "We ain't got time for them white girl tears, though they are very tasty." (P-Valley, S01E04)
  • ♫: Lil Murda – "Fallin'" (P-Valley, S01E04)
  • ♫: Grimes – "Oblivion" (I May Destroy You, S01E09)
  • ♫: FKA twigs – "home with you" (I May Destroy You, S01E09)
  • ♫: Alice Smith – "I Put a Spell on You" (I May Destroy You, S01E09)
  • ♫: Janelle Monáe – "Come Alive [War of the Roses]" (I May Destroy You, S01E09)
  • "Rose, Gangnam's dead! I'm back, baby!" (Maxxx, S01E04)
  • "Anthony Robbins me." (Maxxx, S01E04)
  • "I'm a longtime believer, first-time prayer." (Maxxx, S01E04)
  • "I love MySpace. I love Selena Gomez. I love gravel." (Maxxx, S01E05)
  • "Oh, it's like a Richard Curtis movie. Oh, I'm just a boy, sitting under a whore, telling her I don't love her." (Maxxx, S01E05)
  • "We could give him CBD oil. That cures everything." (Maxxx, S01E05)
  • "Yo, Stephen Fry, shut up." (Maxxx, S01E05)
  • ♫: "Wade in the Water" (Maxxx, S01E05)
  • "I bleed authenticness-ness. Ask Crazy Frog, ask Jedward, ask Justin Timberlake." (Maxxx, S01E06)
  • "Who is the biggest comeback ever?"
    "I don't know. Shia LaBeouf."
    "Jesus Christ."
    "I don't know, I'm just throwing out names, bro."
    "No, literally, Jesus Christ." (Maxxx, S01E06)
  • "I find it ironic that my actual gender fluid turned out to be gender fluid." (Maxxx, S01E06)
  • "Wes Anderson themed, except we're gonna actually use black people in it." (Maxxx, S01E06)
  • "You're not a kind of girl who's obsessed with penis size. You…not that that is relevant to me at all. Because…it's…at least average in a number of Asian countries." (Maxxx, S01E06)
  • "I wanna wear you like a feedbag." (Maxxx, S01E06)
  • Maxxx Season Grade: D

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: The Great
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: What We Do in the Shadows

pro-hentai, anti-degeneracy

Three remakes debut on Billboard's rock radio charts dated Aug. 1.

Leading the way among debuting tracks is the late Chris Cornell's version of Guns N' Roses' "Patience," which bows at No. 16 on Mainstream Rock Songs and No. 36 on Alternative Airplay.

Also on Mainstream Rock Songs, Three Days Grace returns at No. 31 with its version of Gotye's "Somebody That I Used to Know."

And on Alternative Airplay, Silversun Pickups debut at No. 40 with "Toy Soldiers," an amped-up take on Martika.

What are we even doing anymore?

A Pee-wee Herman Society

Previously on Adam Riff™:

Grimaldi's, okay.

Geno's, sure.

Party Fowl?

I assume Prince's, Hattie B's, and Bolton's all passed.


Is El Torito known for its carnitas street taco? Because I know it for its Sunday brunch – and being a dying restaurant chain.

This is like queso-flavoured chips inspired by QDOBA in Austin, TX.

Idea: A potato taco in which the potato is reconstituted carnitas street taco Lay's.

Idea: Fried chicken thigh breaded in crushed Nashville-hot-chicken-flavoured chicken breast.

Idea: Shrimp-flavoured fish skin.

Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

31. Funeral Crasher (Maxxx, S01E01)

Stray Observations

  • "This fantasy cheap. Real life, I don't think you could afford her." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • ♫: Valerie June – "Workin' Woman Blues" (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "Well, the closest I've been to Atlanta is the Freaknik chapter in A Man in Full." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "I'll text you."
    "I'll reply." (P-Valley, S01E03)

(P-Valley, S01E03)

  • "Ears stay more open than legs at The Pynk." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "Get you some sunscreen. We don't want you getting black now." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "A wise woman once told me: Don't let not one nigga know what you abouts to do. Just let these bitches watch." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • ♫: 5 Alarm – "Twerk Sumtin'" (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "Well, bless your thotty little hearts." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "Keyshawn, girl, bring your titties. This baby up here hungry." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • ♫: Tokyo Vanity – "Trinity Dance" (P-Valley, S01E03)

(P-Valley, S01E03)

  • "Right now your shit more like salad."
    "Romaine or frisée?" (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • ♫: The Showboys – "Drag Rap" (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "Ain't no vitamin D in the VIP." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "It's all there."
    "You know I don't trust white people." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "Being banging sometime more a burden than a blessing." (P-Valley, S01E03)
  • "I'm not straight, I just love dick." (I May Destroy You, S01E08)
  • "I come from a generation of people that felt your power 'cause you came up in their face."
    "The Louis C.K. generation?" (Maxxx, S01E01)
  • "What do you see?"
    [Michael Jackson]
    "Ugh, a depressing HBO documentary." (Maxxx, S01E01)
  • "I'm woke enough to talk about periods." (Maxxx, S01E01)
  • "Biggie Smalls dies, suddenly Puffy is selling Sting to black people. Thnk about that for a second. Sting to black people. That's the power of death." (Maxxx, S01E01)
  • "Let's suck it out of the cadaver." (Maxxx, S01E02)
  • "Cocaine, ecstasy, Adderall, Molly, Meow Meow, Benzodiazepines, uppers, downers, wheatgrass shot." (Maxxx, S01E02)
  • "Where should I gain entry?" (Maxxx, S01E02)
  • "Who needs integrity when you can be successful?" (Maxxx, S01E02)
  • ♫: The La's – "Feelin'" (Brassic, S01E01)

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: The Great
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: What We Do in the Shadows

Demon Semen

…Oh yeah?

Venn diagram of Entourage fanatics and podcast listeners.

Meanwhile, Christopher and Adriana host dueling Sopranos re-watch podcasts???

I'm surprised that Jim Beaver doesn't have a Deadwood re-watch podcast, given his regular presence commenting on Alan Sepinwall's Deadwood rewinds.

Podcast Idea: Actors watch and discuss selections from their filmographies à la The A.V. Club's Random Roles. The catch: They don't know the selections beforehand. Each season, a different actor. Limited time commitment.

When convention money dries up.

How much has Norman Reedus missed out on this year?