is gonna build a mountain
I was researching places to eat at in Toronto and stumbled upon this:
foie gras on bone marrow with strawberry compote, peanuts, and marshmallow fluff
And you eat it like that. No bread.
The same restaurant previously offered a dish called The Gout – two dozen smoked oysters stuffed inside a de-boned sea trout, which was then stuffed inside a de-boned baby goat and roasted by charcoal.
DIY Network's latest Vanilla Ice series sends the renovating rapper to Amish country
LATEST Vanilla Ice series
where he learns all about hand craftsmanship, barn building and brotherly bonding. Vanilla Ice Goes Amish will premiere Saturday, Oct. 12.
Other new DIY Network shows include Rev Run's Project, which follows Joseph "Reverend Run" Simmons as he renovates his 9,000-square-foot New Jersey home, and Daryl's Restoration Over-Hall Project, which features Hall & Oates' Daryl Hall renovating his 1700s Connecticut home.
What should we call this burgeoning genre? County fair repair?
Rory: Celebrity rehab.
DIY Network's latest Rev Run series sends the renovating rapper to Amish country. Raising Barns. "Kings from Queens from teens rumspring."
New Cribs on the Block.
Where to begin?
Ted Allen on The Alton Browncast:
There was a pilot made for Chopped that never aired – I have a copy of it – in which the concept was very different. The original Chopped was set in a mansion. The host of the show was the butler of the mansion, in a tuxedo. The host would hold a chihuahua. The contestants would pull up in limousines. And, each course, when somebody was chopped, their food was fed to the chihuahua.
Clearing out the rest of my notes…
Grilled Lemongrass Short Rib Banh Mi Sandwich (Bunker, QNS)
with shiso, peanuts, pickled vegetable, mayo, cilantro, jalapeno, sriracha, and crab chips
Bunker is a Vietnamese restaurant located in the middle of nowhere. You can't go wrong with anything on its menu.
This appetizer is particularly delectable:
Traditional Banh Xeo (Bunker, QNS)
crispy vietnamese crepe, shrimp, bacon, egg, bean sprouts, lettuce
Num Pang is a Cambodian sandwich shop chain. You can't go wrong with anything on its menu either.
This sandwich is my favourite:
Roasted Chicken 'Chimi' Sandwich (Num Pang, NYC)
pickled apple, chili yogurt "mayo"
That the chicken is dark meat is one reason why.
Guacamole "Nam Prik Num" (Xixa, BKN)
avocado, roasted tomato, poblano, puffed rice, jicama, carrot
Oof. I should've looked up what "nam prik num" is (a Thai chile dip) before ordering this guac. It was a struggle to finish, chock-full of poblano, and injected with fish sauce and palm sugar, with no chips (or not enough puffed rice) to offset its gnarly flavour and texture. It's like a crudité from hell.
Two far more successful spins on Mexican food:
"Steak Tacos" (Xixa, BKN)
chilmole tortillas, roasted bone marrow, steak tartare, pepper marmalade
Corn Flan "Tamale" (Xixa, BKN)
blue crab, poblano-garlic cream, bell pepper
Jon's Current New York City Mexican Chip-Food Leaderboard
Chips
1. Empellón Taqueria, NYC
2. Taqueria Tlaxcalli, BRX
3. Mesa Coyoacán, BKN
Guacamole
Mesa Azteca, BKN
Nachos
Professor Thom's, NYC
Mesa Coyoacán also makes a mean steak quesadilla.
Middling curiosities:
Kimchee Carbonara (King Noodle, BKN)
bacon, doritos
Mapo Tofu Chili Cheese Fries (King Noodle, BKN)
american cheese
Pablo Escobar Hot Dog (Los Perros Locos, NYC)
salsa de piña, apple chipotle slaw, potato chips, kewpie mayo, dusting of "perico"
Popcorn Pudding (Sugar Freak, QNS)
Kugel Double Down (Scharf and Zoyer, BKN)
maple farmer's cheese, fried shallots, orange/apricot preserves
Shrimp n Grits (The Shady Lady, QNS)
andouille sausage, crispy hominy grits
The grits, as you can see, are curiously served as a crisp-on-the-outside rectangular block.
It reminded me of Chinese food.
Scuttlebutt Sandwich (Saltie, BKN)
hard-boiled egg, feta, capers, black olive, pickled vegetables, pimenton aioli
On paper, this vegetarian sandwich seems horrid, but it works!
Gold Stars
Eggplant Dip (The Dutch, NYC)
Pimento Cheese (Boxing Room, SF)
Lamburger (Landhaus, BKN)
custom blend of grass-fed lamb and pork fat-back, whipped sheep's milk feta, house-made harissa, grilled onions, and cilantro, on napoli bakery roll
Crispy Lamb Sandwich (Fritzl's Lunch Box, BKN)
yogurt, pickled beets, and onions, with spicy cilantro relish, on flatbread
Pollo Asado Taco (Los Tacos No. 1, NYC)
Jerk Chicken (Exquisite Delight, BKN)
Festival (Exquisite Delight, BKN)
Okay, the Clip of the Week proper is
35. Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (Breaking Bad, S05E11)
but I'm featuring some August UK television that I just saw this week instead.
35x. That's How Strong My Love Is (Southcliffe, S01E03)
The scenes in this episode featuring Anatol Yusef's grieving husband/father are tremendous, capped off by the above clip.
Honourable Mention
Stray Observations
(Futurama, S07E25)
Looking ahead:
Wednesday is the new Thursday.
Moebius
A couple's fight over the husband's infidelity turns to a grotesque calamity. After failing to sever her husband's penis, the infuriated wife chooses instead to dismember her son in order to hurt his father.
an actual screencap of the trailer
Drew: False alarm apparently my boy got a 12th player and didn't tell any of us.
Jon: Well, shit, what am I gonna do with all these team names I brainstormed?
Drew: "Lee Daniels' The Cutler"?
Jon: Eh?
Drew: Heh. "Mantichrist."
Theta Chi + Pac-12 logo =
Better or worse than FXX's logo?
And now, how to re-brand to fool undiscriminating shoppers:
See also:
I remember being crushed when a mate's mum bought me Ninja Gaiden III: The Ancient Ship of Doom (NES) for my birthday when I had asked for Ninja Turtles III: The Manhattan Project.
Previously on Adam Riff™:
I type this while wearing retainers I had molded earlier this week.
[sees upper retainer on ottoman]
Oh shit. Did I throw the lower one away?
And that's why you don't store them in a paper towel during lunch!
[rummages through rubbish]
It's not here…
[spots lower retainer on floor]
[sanitizes retainers with everything short of bleach]
[sighs] Okay.
[stares at lower retainer]
Remember, Jon, some people lick buttholes. A retainer that fell on the floor is NOTHING.
Once a week, minimum. [source]
I change mine twice a week but 3x a week in summer. [source]
[pause]
They're Gawker commenters, though.
Jon: hey, how often do you change your bed sheets?
Lozo: it depends, but ideally, once every two weeks
Chris: like every two weeks
Howard: < two weeks
I thought I was a clean person for changing bed sheets every three months. WELP...
I don't think I ever changed bed sheets in college.
Some days, New York City feels surreal. All of this originated from a single-celled organism. [head asplode]
Some days, I feel surreal. I am a living human being. This is my body.
Science Fiction Idea: What if fetuses decided whether or not to be aborted? Carriers have no say. If you get pregnant, your fetus decides whether it wants you as a mother. My body, its choice. Unprotected sex becomes high stakes gambling. Murders of babies, who are undeniably human, rise.
While content with my life, I harbour a shipping container of regrets, some that I desperately wish I could go back in time and change.
Some nights, I fall asleep wondering what could have been.
Book Idea: My life as a "choose your own adventure" – an autobiography with hypothetical narratives branching off.
