Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

on

27. Skin Plates (Total Blackout, S02E15)

Stray Observations

  • What in tarnation is Paula Malcomson's accent? (Ray Donovan, S01E01)
  • He dyed him green? (Ray Donovan, S01E01)
  • Love the moobs and strength suit continuity (The Venture Bros., S05E05)
  • "Rumour has it the creature on the cover of Diamond Dogs is actually an unaltered photo of the Sovereign. He may also have been the woman beside Bowie on the cover of Pin Ups." (The Venture Bros., S05E05)
  • An OSI agent named Slap Chop (The Venture Bros., S05E05)
  • Tank Top (The Venture Bros., S05E05)
  • "Did Joe Eszterhas write that for you?" (The Venture Bros., S05E05)
  • Who is he…? OH. The lead in Submarine! (Skins, S07E01)
  • "Can you imagine our neighbours back in Brentwood helping out this way?"
    "I don't even know who our neighbours are."
    Lolololol (Under the Dome, S01E02)

#clipoftheweek

  • sumorV
    [redacted] stopped obsessing over the Oculus Rift long enough to create another mixtape

We press play, don't press pause

on

1979: Brenda Russell releases "A Little Bit of Love."

Sep 1997: Joe releases "Don't Wanna Be a Player."

Oct 1997: Big Pun releases "I'm Not A Player."

1998: Big Pun releases "Still Not a Player," a remix of "I'm Not a Player" that samples "A Little Bit of Love" and interpolates "Don't Wanna Be a Player."

Feb 2000: Big Pun dies.

Sep 2000: Incubus releases a remix of "Still Not a Player" – a remix of a remix.

2003: Thalía releases "I Want You," which samples "A Little Bit of Love" and features Big Pun's Terror Squad mate Fat Joe.

Mar 2013: Ariana Grande releases "The Way," which samples "Still Not a Player," which samples "A Little Bit of Love."

Now we just need Incubus' DJ to mash up "I Want You" and "The Way."

currently listening: "Big Pimpin' (Lullaby Rendition)"

Rocks and Vandals

on


WUT.

I saw this at Whole Paycheck:


"School Safe" vanilla cupcakes – dairy-free, nut-free, and chocolate-free, but curiously not gluten-free.

I wonder how the rise of peanut allergies – B's children are both allergic – has affected sales of Snickers and Reese's.

Faking a peanut allergy is a shrewd move to avoid receiving Mr. Goodbars on Halloween.

Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack
I don't care if I have an attack

What do children in Thailand who are allergic to peanuts eat?

Rory: Axe Yeeves.


Evidently, For Dummies is still a thing.

As is iWon.com.

[dials 1-800-MUSICNOW]

Idea: WikiLiqs. Wiski. Wodka. Wikuila.

It annoys me mightily when judges on television cooking competitions describe meat as "perfectly cooked."

How do you know that's it's perfectly cooked? What is perfect? And how do you measure it? Perfect is an absolute quality, and cooking is conditional.

Superbly cooked? Sure. Perfectly cooked? Ehh… It's like saying God doesn't exist. HOW DO YOU KNOW?

Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

on

26. Chocolate Rain (Mad Men, S06E13)

Honourable Mention

Stray Observations

  • "Los Angeles is not what you see in the movies. It's like Detroit with palm trees." (Mad Men, S06E13)
  • "Three fucks, you're out." (Veep, S02E10)
  • "You like to have sex and you like to travel?"
    "Yes, ma'am."
    "Then you can fuck off." (Veep, S02E10)
  • "Jesus, you wrote this shit?"
    "Yeah, it's like noun verb gumbo." (Veep, S02E10)
  • "Ant Kibbutz" (Veep, S02E10)
  • "D.C.: District of Cunts." (Veep, S02E10)
  • "Was your mom plagiarizing the Bible when she said, 'Oh God, oh God'?" (Veep, S02E10)


(Under the Dome, S01E01)

  • "You're just…sucking a toe." (Total Blackout, S02E14)
  • "Who is Hen Tai?" (Zach Stone Is Gonna Be Famous, S01E09)
  • "It's a well known fact that the greatest actors have the healthiest personal lives – Eddie Murphy, Hugh Grant, Morgan Freeman…" (Zach Stone Is Gonna Be Famous, S01E10)

#clipoftheweek

  • FuManTunes
    I updated Adam Riff™'s audio repository and fixed its broken links.

El Scorcho

on

Babysitting B's children…

"So what do you kids want to do?"

A: Watch YouTube videos of Swedes playing a Minecraft mod.

"Uncle Jon, I'm thirsty!"
"Okay."

[opens refrigerator]

Chocolate hemp milk?

I saw this while picking up kidney stone medication:


MCGUIRE-STYLE MALE URINAL

I know it's for incontinent people, but I kinda want one. No more worrying about needing to pee during a film screening, or finding a restroom on the road.

I don't understand how people can store their wallet in a back pocket. How is that comfortable when sitting down? It's like an ass tumour. Easy to snatch too.

David: That's your wallet?! It's like an inch-and-a-half thick.

Jon: Driver license, two credits cards, a debit/ATM card, auto insurance, health insurance, Social Security card…
Jon: This pocket is all supermarket and drugstore rewards cards.
Jon: 10 different library cards.
Jon: Oh. Forklift operator certification card. Forgot about this.

David: You don't need to carry around like three-fourths of this stuff.
Jon: I know, but I want to be prepared for any situation.
Jon: Swiss Army wallet.