Two dozen other dirty lovers must be a sucker for it

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Lindsay Weir's mom is now Hannah Horvath's mom.

Freaks and Girls
Lindsay Weir as Hannah
Kim Kelly as Marnie
Millie Kentner as Shoshanna
Cindy Sanders as Jessa
Bill Haverchuck as Adam
Nick Andopolis as Charlie
Neal Schweiber as Ray
Daniel Desario as Booth Jonathan

James Franco has played James Dean, Allen Ginsberg, and Hugh Hefner. What other notable 1950s figures can he play?

Jon Casey: One Arthur Fonzarelli.

Freaks and Recreation
Sam Weir as Leslie
Lindsay Weir as Ann
Ken Miller as Ron
Kim Kelly as April
Nick Andopolis as Andy
Neal Schweiber as Ben
Mr. Rosso as Tom
Alan White as Councilman Jamm

Go Tell Fire to the Mountain

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1

Chefs seem to love Goodfellas.

2

Next month: Carlos D discusses Brain Donors.

3
The 12th annual Tribeca Film Festival opens with "Mistaken For Strangers," the story of two very different brothers—one a struggling artist, the other the lead singer of The National.

4

As Actor, Writer, Director, Producer, Cinematographer, and Stunt Coordinator, to name just some of his roles, Jackie Chan picked up a Guinness World Record for his work on Chinese Zodiac: Most Credits in One Movie.

5

PEETA PABLO! Spin it like a helicopter!

So Benicio Del Toro will have played Che Guevara and Pablo Escobar. Someone cast him as El Cid to complete the trifecta.

Give me one acre of cellos, pitched at some distant regret

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Featuring…?

Oh. The dancing 48-year-old in the Black Keys' "Lonely Boy" video.

"I'm elated, and I'm still in shock, to be honest. I've been out [in Los Angeles] for 10 years, pursuing acting and music, so hopefully this will lead to more work," he said.

10 months later:

"I just did the ESPY Awards at Staples Center, working security." [source]

Up until a couple weeks ago, Wansley had a full-time job as a Software Test Engineer. His biggest thrill as a musician in recent years was landing a role in the chorus of the Seattle Opera's production of Porgy and Bess.

A couple weeks later:

Wanz is working on his own brand, setting up a merch website, working on a new EP, and looking to find a way to profit off a series of sayings he's coined over the years, referred to collectively as "The Book of Wanz."

[pause]

Asked if he's worried about being pigeonholed by that one lyric ["this is fu-cking awe-some"], Wanz says, "I'm always gonna be the 'Thrift Shop' guy. The question for me has been, 'Am I gonna stay that guy, or am I gonna be the guy who came in as this, and then they found everything else?'"

Oh Wanny… You and I both know that you're gonna stay that guy. You are Dido to Macklemore's Eminem, Super Cat to his Sugar Ray, LV to his Coolio, the gotta keep 'em separator to his Offspring.

Idea: A bizarro episode of Saturday Night Live that's just an hour of sax solos.

Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

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9. Kev tries to impregnate his girlfriend's mom (Shameless, S03E06)

Honourable Mention

Stray Observations

  • "Your body is a temple, Carl, and you only want to put things in it that are natural."
    "Like fists?" (Shameless, S03E06)
  • Ben Wa balls! (Shameless, S03E06)
  • Frank's urine test solution (Shameless, S03E06)
  • "My Taylor Lautner's fingers keychain." (Jimmy Kimmel Live, 02-24-13)


Matt Damon eating a sandwich (Jimmy Kimmel Live, 02-24-13)


Rare [and reportedly unauthorized] piledriver (WWE Raw, 02-25-13)

  • "We're pretty awesome wingmen for each other, because we're both the guy that girls want to sleep with, and we're both the other guy too."
    "Neither one of us is Tom Cruise or the other one. We're both Iceman." (New Girl, S02E18)
  • "If you ever come around this house again, you best be prepared for me to get inhospitable." (Justified, S04E08)
  • "Now all the things you've done, the way you've built your fortunes, it might make you criminals, but it don't make you outlaws. I am the outlaw, and this is my world, and my world has a high cost of living."
    "How much do you want?"
    "A hundred."
    "Thousand?"
    "Each. Oh, and I want you to help me get a Dairy Queen franchise." (Justified, S04E08)
  • "Dairy Queen is like California real estate – value may dip every now and then, but it always goes back up in the summer time." (Justified, S04E08)
  • "It's funny, because whenever your grandmother orgasmed with me, she always screamed 'Brookstone.'" (The Jeselnik Offensive, S01E02)
  • Brandon's terrible tattoos (Survivor, S26E03)
  • "Tessa's gonna attend a school that values a curious mind, creativity, hard work, intellect, whereas you're most likely gonna attend the University of Florida." (Suburgatory, S02E15)
  • Hogan's Villains (Community, S04E04)
  • "That's my fish! His name's Jermaine!" (Archer, S04E07)
  • "A.B.B.A.B. – Always Be Berating and Belittling." (Archer, S04E07)
  • GameCubes (King of the Nerds, S01E07)
  • "You guys want tickets to the gun show? Then make sure Ben doesn't take off his shirt, 'cause that's called 'the flappy Jew show.'" (The Ben Show, S01E01)
  • "Frozen yogurt is one of the most popular treats in America, enjoyed by everyone, like Asian women." (Nathan For You, S01E01)
  • Mark Cuban hates wristband products (Shark Tank, S04E18)
  • "Nothing is more racist than having one black friend." (Saturday Night Live, S38E15)


(Saturday Night Live, S38E15)

#clipoftheweek

I want to live in a bubble, I need a getaway car

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Previously on Adam Riff™ (May 10, 2010):
Donnie Yen ruled out Ip Man 3 (Ip Man mentors Bruce Lee?), but two more Ip Man biopics will be released this year: Wong Kar-Wai's The Grand Master, starring Tony Leung as Ip Man, and Herman Yau's The Legend Is Born: Ip Man, starring Yu-Hang To, who also appears in Ip Man and Ip Man 2.

Ip Man 3?!

Oh. No. It's the sequel to The Legend Is Born: Ip Man (Ip Man 1B).

Ip Man 2B will premiere in Hong Kong just two months after The Grandmaster (Ip Man 1C) finally opened in cinemas.

Five Ip Man biopics in five years – you'd think he was the Monkey King.

Idea: A weekly podcast that excerpts the best parts of the past week's podcasts – audio Talk Soup.

Odd-looking sneaker.

Oh the ankle part zips down. So your shoes have collars? Banana Jordans.

I'm surprised that TLC hasn't produced Extreme Sneakerheads yet, or MTV an "I am a sneakerhead" episode of True Life.

MTV Casting Call:

TRUE LIFE: I'M TOO BEAUTIFUL
Do you constantly receive compliments and gifts from strangers, but fear you outshine your friends? Do your friends not include you in nights out on the town because you steal the show?

TRUE LIFE: I HAVE DRUNKOREXIA
Do you regularly skip meals so that you can save your calories for nights of binge drinking? Are you concerned about your weight, but not willing to give up partying to live a healthy lifestyle?

Blingo Millions

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Kelly Knows Something (1994)
When the Bundy TV set blows its condenser, Al decides to try out for a place on a new sports trivia game show, hoping to win a new TV set as the first prize. But when he is denied because of his lack of personality, Al tries to transfer his knowledge of sports to Kelly to win the show for him. But for each fact that she takes in, another falls out.

INT. JON'S HEAD – AFTERNOON

Heh. Bynum is like the basketball version of…..of…..G_d, I'm blanking. He played for the Dolphins. Running back. Texas. [pause] Fuck, what is his name?!

[googles "Mike Ditka wedding dress"]

Ricky Williams!

INT. JON'S HEAD – EVENING

"Seinfeld uncle." Three letters. Uncle Ben? No, that's Spider-Man. And rice.

Uncle…..blimey! What is his name?! Abe Vigoda-lookin' motherfucker…

INT. JON'S HEAD – MORNING

Remember Sammy Jankis.

Ben Puchowitz

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WUT. How did I miss this?

"24-Hour Apple Store"

12:06 a.m. | monday
Pepe: Hey, can you do me a favour? How tired are you?
Jon: What?
Pepe: I need an iPad Mini.
Jon: Now? You can't get one in Cleveland?
Pepe: I'd like to set it up before I leave.
Jon: [pause]
Pepe: Please? I'll reimburse your cab fare.
Jon: [sigh] Fine. 5th and…57th?
Pepe: 58th.

12:18 a.m.
Jon: Hey, I can't get a cab.
Pepe: What? Go to 6th Avenue.
Jon: I am on 6th Avenue! But everyone is returning home from Oscar parties, I think.

12:22 a.m.
Fuck this. Subway time.

12:27 a.m.
Should've brought a book.

12:32 a.m.
What is that rat doing?

12:38 a.m.
Guh. Where are the trains?!

12:42 a.m.
Fuck this. I should be able to get a cab now.

1:36 a.m.
Pepe: What took you so long?
Jon: [pause]

1:00 a.m. | 53rd and 6th halal cart
Jon: Can I get a combo platter?