Adam Riff™

1. NJPW Wrestle Kingdom 13
2. Jon Glaser Loves Gear
3. The Good Place
4. WWE SmackDown Live
5. Shark Tank
6. Top Chef: Kentucky
7. PEN15
8. Miracle Workers
9. You're the Worst
10. PEN15
11. Kraft Punk's Political Party
12. Brooklyn Nine-Nine
13. Fresh Off the Boat
14. WWE Raw
15. Shark Tank
16. What We Do in the Shadows
17. I Think You Should Leave Now with Tim Robinson
18. Barry
19. What We Do in the Shadows
20. Cloak and Dagger
21. The Late Late Show Carpool Karaoke Primetime Special 2019
22. Cobra Kai
23. Tucker Carlson Tonight
24. Perpetual Grace, LTD
25. Holey Moley
26. Euphoria
27. 30 for 30: The Good, the Bad, the Hungry
28. Perpetual Grace, LTD
29. Pose
30. The Boys
31. Legion
32. South Side
33. MasterChef
34. Snowfall
35. Bachelor in Paradise
36. Succession
37. South Side
38. The Righteous Gemstones
39. Cake
40. Saturday Night Live
41. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
42. The Righteous Gemstones
43. Watchmen
44. AEW Dynamite
45. Mr. Robot
46. Last Week Tonight with John Oliver
47. NXT TakeOver: WarGames
48. WWE NXT
49. Silicon Valley
50. Saturday Night Live
51. Saturday Night Live

52. Mr. Music (John Mulaney and the Sack Lunch Bunch)

Stray Observations

• ♫: Styx – "Mr. Roboto" (Mr. Robot, S04E12)
• "As far as you're concerned, I am evil incarnate." (Mr. Robot, S04E12)

(Mr. Robot, S04E13)

• "This whole time, I thought changing the world was something you did, an act you performed, something you fought for. I don't know if that's true anymore. What if changing the world was just about being here, by showing up no matter how many times we get told we don't belong, by staying true even when we're shamed into being false, by believing in ourselves even when we're told we're too different? And if we all held on to that, if we refuse to budge and fall in line, if we stood our ground for long enough, just maybe, the world can't help but change around us. Even though we'll be gone, it's like Mr. Robot said: We'll always be a part of Elliot Alderson. And we'll be the best part, because we're the part that always showed up. We're the part that stayed. We're the part that changed him. And who wouldn't be proud of that?" (Mr. Robot, S04E13)
• ♫: M83 – "Outro" (Mr. Robot, S04E13)
• Mr. Robot Season Grade: C
• "To nurse and protect." (The Mandalorian, S01E08)
• "You expect me to search the galaxy for the home of this creature and deliver it to a race of enemy sorcerers?" (The Mandalorian, S01E08)

(The Mandalorian, S01E08)

• "There is nothing to be sad about. I have never been alive." (The Mandalorian, S01E08)
• "Come on, baby! Do the magic hand thing." (The Mandalorian, S01E08)
• The Mandalorian Season Grade: C
• ♫ "Let's all see what's on his mind / The guest star's name is Richard Kind" ♫ (John Mulaney and the Sack Lunch Bunch)
• "What's your favourite comedy special?"
  "Nanette." (John Mulaney and the Sack Lunch Bunch)

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: Watchmen
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: Rick and Morty

2019 AR™TV World Drama Championship Reigns
Homecoming – 35 weeks [carried over from 2018]
Perpetual Grace, LTD – 3 weeks
The Boys – 3 weeks
Snowfall – 3 weeks
Succession – 13 weeks
Watchmen – 3 weeks and counting

2019 AR™TV World Comedy Championship Reigns
Who Is America? – 27 weeks [carried over from 2018]
The Other Two – 36 weeks
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia – 7 weeks
Rick and Morty – 3 weeks and counting

Looking forward:

51. Gumby Returns (Saturday Night Live, S45E10)

Stray Observations

• "Why did you make me wear a mask?"
  "Because masks make men cruel." (Watchmen, S01E09)
• "You look stupid in those panties."
  "I'm about to become the most powerful man alive, Laurie. Waving my dick in people's faces is just overkill. Yee-haw! Let's get blue." (Watchmen, S01E09)
• "Just fucking do it."
  "Do what?"
  "You're gonna kill us, right?"
  "Oh yeah. Of course I am." (Watchmen, S01E09)
• "Where are you?"
  "I'm in every moment we were together, all at once." (Watchmen, S01E09)
• "You can't heal under a mask, Angela. Wounds need air." (Watchmen, S01E09)
• Watchmen Season Grade: B
• ♫: Afterhours – "White Widow" (Mr. Robot, S04E11)
• "You're right. I hate people. I'm scared of them. I've been scared of them practically my whole life. People I loved, people I trusted, have done their absolute worst to me. And for a long time, that's all I ever knew. So, yeah, I called my group 'fsociety,' because you know what? Fuck society. Society deserves to be hated for everything you said they did and more. Fuck every last one of them for what we've all been through. But then there are some people out there, and it doesn't happen a lot, it's rare, but they refuse to let you hate them. In fact, they care about you in spite of it. And the really special ones, they're relentless at it. Doesn't matter what you do to them. They take it, and care about you anyway. They don't abandon you, no matter how many reasons you give them, no matter how much you're practically begging them to leave. And you wanna know why? Because they feel something for me that I can't. They love me. And for all the pain I've been through, that heals me. Maybe not instantly, maybe not even for a long time, but it heals. And, yeah, there are setbacks. We do fucked up things to each other. And we hurt each other, and it gets messy, but that's just us, in any world you're in. And, yeah, you're right. We're all told we don't stand a chance, and yet we stand. We break, but we keep going, and that is not a flaw. It's what makes us." (Mr. Robot, S04E11)
• "No, no, Elliot. I just wanna know you're on my side."
  "Always." (Mr. Robot, S04E11)
• "Ugh, you young people think space is like Saturday Night Live. You see it every day, so you dream of being in it, but it dreams of removing all the air from your body and making you float around it for eternity as a flash-mummified corpse." (Rick and Morty, S04E05)
• "Morty's starting to look like a '90s Japanese ghost." (Rick and Morty, S04E05)
• "I killed their… What's his name? Their Buzz Aspirin?"
  "It's actually Buzz Advil, Morty." (Rick and Morty, S04E05)
• "You can't bring that boulder in here."
  "What?"
  "I said no boulders. This ain't the lake, buddy."
  "Drop the rock!"
  "Well, it's kind of a…a service boulder." (Rick and Morty, S04E05)
• "You want to go to Boob World, Summer?"
  "Eh, not today." (Rick and Morty, S04E05)
• "He's trying to eat me." (The Mandalorian, S01E07)
• "Can I offer you a libation to celebrate the closing of our shared narrative?" (The Mandalorian, S01E07)
• "I would like to see the baby."
  "Uh, it is asleep."
  "We all will be quiet." (The Mandalorian, S01E07)
• "We're not battling a 12 year-old from the fuckin' Ren Faire." (Harley Quinn, S01E04)
• "Is she mad about the paywall too? $7.99 is an ambitious price point." (Harley Quinn, S01E04)
• "I've…"
  "Yes?"
  "No, no, I wasn't saying your name. I was saying 'I've' as in 'I've got a plan.'" (Harley Quinn, S01E04)

(Saturday Night Live, S45E10)

• "Recent polls show that Pete Buttigieg has only 4% support among African Americans, but that will change once Pete announces his running mate, the Popeyes chicken sandwich." (Saturday Night Live, S45E10)
• "'Baudi Moovin' is my alter ego that I use online to hide my identity. And 'Body Movin" is a song from the Beastie Boys." (Don't Fuck with Cats, S01E01)
• Don't Fuck with Cats Season Grade: B

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: Watchmen
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: Rick and Morty

50. Children's Clothing Ad (Saturday Night Live, S45E09)

Stray Observations

• "White people love to split up families." (Shameless, S10E05)
• "Cold Ice Cream and Hot Kisses. Over here, The Prince of Puget Sound." (Silicon Valley, S06E07)
• "That's what Florian says to Claudette outside the cheese cave!" (Silicon Valley, S06E07)
• "Oppenheimer famously said he regretted building the atom bomb and died in despair, but what the fuck does that have to do with anything?"
  "Oppenheimer. What a self-obsessed little bitch." (Silicon Valley, S06E07)
• "Roger Bannister. Now imagine he'd gone into cardiac arrest and evacuated on himself and died. And as he lay there with his prolapsed anus peeking beneath the running shorts on his newly dead body, the crowd jeered and grimaced. That is what has to happen to us. We have to shit ourselves to death." (Silicon Valley, S06E07)
• "Fast and powerful. Sounds a little bit like you, Andre Iguodala." (Silicon Valley, S06E07)
• "Give it up for Menlo Bark!" (Silicon Valley, S06E07)
• "It may help if, at least for the time being, you pretend to be mad at me."
  "Look, Richard, I was a world theater minor at Vassar, but that is one Javanese shadow play that I cannot perform." (Silicon Valley, S06E07)
• "You graduates have a lot of responsibility finishing the important work of movements such as 'pound met double zero' and 'title icks.'" (Silicon Valley, S06E07)
• "This fall, we actually had a herpes epidemic among the residents, which is bad medically, but, from another perspective, it's kind of touching." (Silicon Valley, S06E07)
• Silicon Valley Season Grade: D
• "Alexa, play some Faith Hill." (Mr. Robot, S04E10)
• "She is just a robot you use to buy paper towels." (Mr. Robot, S04E10)
• "You know, maybe it was what my boy Joubert says: 'I don't interest myself in the why.
  I think more often in terms of the when, sometimes where, but always how much.'" (Mr. Robot, S04E10)
• "I gotta take a whiz, okay? Too many Code Reds this morning." (Mr. Robot, S04E10)
• ♫: Carly Rae Jepsen – "Run Away with Me" (Mr. Robot, S04E10)
• "You know who's into dragons, Morty? Nerds that refuse to admit they're Christian." (Rick and Morty, S04E04)
• "Go to Brenner Ass." (Rick and Morty, S04E04)
• "Hey, why do you have Future's self-titled album on vinyl?" (Rick and Morty, S04E04)
• "Grandpa, do something, or I will tweet, and you will be canceled." (Rick and Morty, S04E04)
• "Get out of Florida, you overthinking cat."
  "Why don't you go overthink shit up north in Georgia?" (Rick and Morty, S04E04)
• "This man with a ponytail makes a valid point. All dragons are sluts deep down." (Rick and Morty, S04E04)
• "Eggnog?"
  "What's in it?"
  "Oh, uh, heavy cream, egg yolks, sugar, and rum."
  "Mmm! So I'm drinking cake?"
  "Yeah."
  "What a fantastic White idea." (Black-ish, S06E10)
• "How about we repackage some of the surplus? We still have lots of leftover Mexican Joker."
  "That's 'cause people didn't really like Mexican Joker." (South Park, S23E10)
• "It's cocaine that's farm to nostril." (South Park, S23E10)
• South Park Season Grade: C
• "I wonder what you look like under there. Maybe he's a Gungan. Is that why yousa don't wanna show your face?" (The Mandalorian, S01E06)
• Door gag (The Mandalorian, S01E06)
• "That really hurt, you cunt!" (Harley Quinn, S01E03)
• "Unlike the Saiyan Souls, the clients here haven't changed their hairstyles much in the past few decades." (Joe Pera Talks with You, S02E03)
• "And Louise. Her best friend is wine." (Joe Pera Talks with You, S02E03)

The New AR™TV World Drama Champion: Watchmen
The New AR™TV World Comedy Champion: Rick and Morty

49. Puddle of Mudd (Silicon Valley, S06E06)

Stray Observations

• Jeremy Irons farting (Watchmen, S01E07)
• ♫: Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross – "LIFE ON MARS?" (Watchmen, S01E07)
• "My number is: I like anal." (Shameless, S10E04)
• Donald Trump (Mr. Robot, S04E09)
• "Because one time, I threw a party and David Copperfield said it was beat." (Silicon Valley, S06E06)
• "Gwart hates Puddle of Mudd." (Silicon Valley, S06E06)
• "Look, a lot of people made a name for themselves at parties. Bane, he decided to blow up Gotham Stadium during Trivia Night."
  [cutaway]
  "Oh, the Dallas Cowboys."
  "Incorrect. The Steelers have won the most games at Gotham Stadium."
  "I'm gonna blow up Gotham Stadium." (Harley Quinn, S01E02)
• "You ruined the bank mitzvah."
  "Boooo!"
  "And crippled an improv troupe!"
  "Meh. Well." (Harley Quinn, S01E02)
• "Those guys are such dicks."
  "No, not all of 'em. When we were leaving, Bane said, 'You go, girl!'"
  "No, he distinctly said, 'Ooh, Go-Gurt.'" (Harley Quinn, S01E02)
• "Today, I follow rules because I am afraid of jail." (Joe Pera Talks with You, S02E02)

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: Succession
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

48. Cole World 2 (WWE NXT, 11-27-19)

Stray Observations

• Cheyenne Jackson (Watchmen, S01E06)
• The man who Will Reeves arrests and later shoots in the head is Fred Trump (Watchmen, S01E06)
• Minutemen photo (Watchmen, S01E06)
• "All right. You can hang yourself now." (Watchmen, S01E06)
• Lady Trieu reading The Fountainhead (Watchmen, S01E06)
• "Yo, Arby's be delicious, though. Got that five for five. Shit's the fiscally responsible meal." (Mr. Robot, S04E08)
• "I ain't never had Momofukus, bro." (Mr. Robot, S04E08)
• "Ta-ta for now, you flange." (Mr. Robot, S04E08)
• "A signing with Catherines Alpha through Omega Joneses!" (Rick and Morty, S04E03)
• Elon Musk (Rick and Morty, S04E03)
• "Rick, I think this was a powerful lesson in the dangers of AI, which, by the way, means 'love' in Chinese." (Rick and Morty, S04E03)
• 'Klay Thompson' (Black-ish, S06E09)
• "The spice melange." (South Park, S23E08)
• "My fellow whites!" (Harley Quinn, S01E01)
• "Leave Joker for who? Some reliable square who thinks he's quirky for playing on a dodgeball team and calls himself a 'beer nerd'?"
  "Okay, I know you're talking about Dan. It was my first year at Sarah Lawrence. There were very slim pickings." (Harley Quinn, S01E01)

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: Succession
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia